Season 13 - Episode 8 - Acula

There are billions of stars, millions of planets, but there is only one man, Terrance McDoogal. Welcome to LIU Atlas.

LIU Atlas - Acula

The Ludgonian Industrial Union's galaxy contains billions of stars and billions of planets. Unfortunately, most residents of the LIU could only name a handful of these worlds. In order to improve astronomy grades across the LIU Galaxy, TV2 has started a new program called LIU Atlas. Follow our host, Terrance McDoogal, as he takes you on a tour across the LIU and some of its more obscure worlds.


Note: This episode is presented in full screen. The corresponding dialogue is underneath each photo.

Doog: “Welcome to another episode of LIU Atlas. I’m your host, Terrance “Doog” McDoogal. Today, we’re visiting the moon, Acula, which orbits the gas giant, Acus. Acula is an ocean moon, meaning that 99.99% of the moon’s surface is covered in water. A small volcanic column is the only dry landform on the entire body. That’s where we are headed.”

Doog: “Alright folks, I’ve been dropped off on Acula’s sole landform, the Needle. This spire is the hardened core of an ancient volcano’s central vent. It’s the only terrain on Acula above sea-level. Nearly all the available real estate on this tall, natural tower is being used. There’s buildings, sensors, and communication gear jutting out from every part of the Needle. In case you haven’t spotted me, I’m on the summit of this multi-story, rocky pinnacle. I’m the unprepared guy being battered by the elements.”

Doog: “Like a lot of worlds with this much water, Acula experiences tons of precipitation. Downpours, like this, are the norm. You could be here a month and never see the sun. There are also some fierce waves down below. The waves are driven by the stormy weather and Acus’ gravitational pull. I’d get a closer look at these waves, but I don’t want to slip on this wet landing platform. I’ll just wait here, in the pouring rain, for my guide.”

Nadel: “Who are you?”
Doog: “I’m Doog.”
Nadel: “Oh.”
Doog: “Who are you?”
Nadel: “I’m Nadel.”
Doog: “So…are we going to go inside?”
Nadel: “You can. I have to wait outside here for a visitor.”
Doog: “Aren’t I the visitor?”
Nadel: “No. I’m looking for a Terrance McDoogal.”
Doog: “That’s me!”
Nadel: “You said your name was Doog.”
Doog: “Yeah, Doog is short for McDoogal!”
Nadel: “Are you sure?”
Doog: “Of course, I’m sure! Why else would I be standing out here in this monsoon!”
Nadel: “Good point.”
Doog: “Are we going to go inside now?”
Nadel: “Ah, yes. I guess we should.

Doog: “I think I’d only be half as wet if you realized that Doog and McDoogal are the same name. Your elevator doesn’t go all the way to the top floor – does it?”
Nadel: “The elevator works just fine. We’re on the top floor now.”
Doog: “I can’t tell if you’re arguing with me about your intelligence…or if we’re actually in an elevator.”
Nadel: “Huh?”
Doog: “I’m thinking we’re actually in an elevator.”
Nadel: “Yes. The elevator is working. It connects all the floors of the Needle. I’ll press the down button now.”

Doog: “What do we have here?”
Nadel: “This is the main control room.”
Doog: “What do they control?”
Nadel: “Lots of things. Mostly things on the Needle.”
Doog: “Obviously. You can’t tell me more than that?”
Nadel: “More than what?”
Doog: “You’re about as sharp as a bowling ball, aren’t you?”
Nadel: “What’s a bowling ball?”
Aguja: “Give Nadel a break. He hasn’t been the same since that lightning strike a few years back.”
Doog: “Why did you make him my guide then?”
Aguja: “There’s not much else he’s good for.”
Doog: “Want to trade him spots for an hour?”
Aguja: “Ha! You want me to leave the facility in Nadel’s hands? No thanks.”
Doog: “That wouldn’t be the best idea, would it? I guess this is one of those episodes where I fill in the blanks myself. Shall we continue, Nadel?”

Doog: “Either we’re descending really far – like to the center of the planet – or you forgot to press the down button.”
Nadel: “I’m pretty sure I pressed it.”
Doog: “I’m pretty sure you didn’t. We’ve been standing here staring at each other for like nine minutes.”
Nadel: “Hmm. It doesn’t usually take this long to go down a floor. I’ll press it again, I guess.”
Doog: “That would be great.”

Doog: “This is pretty self-explanatory. This is clearly a weather radar screen.”
Nadel: “No. This is the weather station. People here monitor storms, wind, and…and…and…lightning.”
Doog: “That’s kind of what I just said, but I don’t want to argue. What’s next?”
Nadel: “Go to the left.”

Doog: “Why are we out here on this narrow catwalk with wobbly handrails?! I was just getting dry!”
Nadel: “On my off-time, I’m an amateur meteorologist. I don’t need computers. Hmm, let me see. It appears to be raining.”
Doog: “Are you kidding me! You brought me out here for this!”

Doog: “I was watching this time. You didn’t press the button.”
Nadel: “I’m pretty sure I…”
Doog: “PUSH IT!”

Nadel: “The next several floors are devoted to various forms of communications. I think this is the subspace receiver.”
Doog: “I saw all the comm equipment outside. Is that the purpose of the Needle? Is that the economy? Communications?”
Nadel: “I’m not sure what you’re asking.”
Doog: “Of course not. Wait…what is that noise over the comms? Is that snoring?”
Nadel: “That is not a communication. That is…”

Nadel: “…Aiguille’s sleep apnea.”
Doog: “Why is there a guy sleeping in the comms room?”
Nadel: “He is probably tired.”
Doog: “I don’t mean - why is he sleeping - I mean - why is he sleeping here?”
Nadel: “This is where his bed is, I guess.”
Doog: “I walked right into that one. Isn’t there a better place for his bed?”
Nadel: “The Needle is limited. Rooms often have two or three purposes. The next floor is radio telemetry. There are two more beds in there. There are also bathrooms in there.”
Doog: “The bathrooms are mixed into a communication room?!”
Nadel: “Yes.”
Doog: “Gross. Let’s skip that room.”

Doog: “I think we might have skipped more than that bathroom communications place.”
Nadel: “Sorry. I wanted to make sure to press the down button this time.”
Doog: “Yeah. I saw. You pressed it like four times.”
Nadel: “We can return and press the up.”
Doog: “No need. I’m not mad about it. If you’ve seen one communications room, you’ve seen them all.”
Nadel: “If you say so.”
Doog: “So…to recap – the Needle is a communication relay of some sort. Right?”
Nadel: “I guess you can say that. It is one purpose of the Needle.”
Doog: “So, there’s more?”
Nadel: “I think so.”

Doog: “And…we’re outside again. Tell me this isn’t another weather forecasting foray.”
Nadel: “Huh?”
Doog: “Why are we outside again!?”
Nadel: “This is where the containers come.”
Doog: “Ships drop off cargo here too?”
Nadel: “No. Containers come from below. They float to the surface. Magnetic cranes catch them.”
Doog: “There’s stuff below the surface?”
Nadel: “Yes. The Needle goes to the seafloor.”
Doog: “Back to the elevator again…I guess.”

Doog: “We’ve gone down again. Nadel wasn’t lying. The facility goes below the ocean’s surface. This looks like some type of moonpool.”
Nadel: “The surface waves are too violent. It is easier to access the ocean from below.”
Doog: “Why access the ocean at all? Is fishing part of the economy? What’s down there?”
Nadel: “No.”
Doog: “No? No, what? Which question?”
Nadel: “We use mini-subs to go below. Get inside.”
Doog: “We’re going below? Are you qualified?”
Nadel: “I’ve made several trips below.”

Nadel: “Everything looks good. I think you are ready to go below.”
Doog: “Can someone else check? The whole forgetting to press the elevator buttons makes me question your attention to detail.”
Nadel: “Everything looks fine.”
Doog: “Have someone else check! Not just you!”
Nadel: “You will be fine. Launching your mini-sub now.”
Doog: “Wait!!!”

Doog: “Being underwater always makes me claustrophobic, and these mini-subs aren’t helping. Could it get any tighter in here?”
Nadel: “Press the red button on the left to tighten your harness further.”
Doog: “I don’t want it tighter. I’m trying to say that this thing is cramped.”
Nadel: “Oh. You want the orange button then.”
Doog: “The orange button? That will make this thing expand?”
Nadel: “No. It will eject you from the mini-sub. You will not be cramped anymore.”
Doog: “I think I’m just going to avoid all the buttons. Forward, backward, and side-to-side is all I need.”

Nadel: “Acula has an abundance of energy. Tidal forces from Acus generate waves and currents. Tidal forces also cause volcanic activity. Both forms of power are collected with machines like this.”
Doog: “How does it work?”
Nadel: “I don’t know.”
Doog: “That’s par for the course.”

Doog: “So, Acula is a communication relay and a power provider. Got it.”
Nadel: “Acula is the support for Acus.”
Doog: “Support for Acus?”
Nadel: “The Acus Facility lacks many resources. The Needle provides them.”
Doog: “There’s a facility on the gas giant?”

Nadel: “Yes. The Needle sends them power.  The Needle handles their communications. The Needle even monitors weather conditions on Acus to keep the facility safe.”
Doog: “That weather room we saw wasn’t for Acula. That makes sense. Why monitor weather here? We know it rains and storms all the time.”
Nadel: “Yes. You see now.”
Doog: “I do. Acula supports another facility on the gas giant.”
Nadel: “Yes, but there is one more thing that makes Acula special.”
Doog: “What?”

Nadel: “Acula has native life. Most of it is simple, and it only exists around the Needle.”
Doog: “The only life on this whole moon is by the Needle?”
Nadel: “Yes. Life here is driven by the hydrothermal vents.”
Doog: “I’m guessing these vents were formed by the same volcanic activity that made the Needle.”
Nadel: “I think so.”
Doog: “So, you guys harvest these blue tube things?”
Nadel: “No. The tubes worms are not useful. They are filter feeders, eating bacteria around the vents. Most have high concentrations of bacterial toxins in their bodies, but not enough to be useful.”
Doog: “You can never go right with toxic tubes. Trust me. I’ve been to few brothels with that very problem.”
Nadel: “Huh?”
Doog: “Never mind. So, did you say they don’t have enough toxins?”
Nadel: “Yes. Harvesting the tube worms would not be efficient.”

Nadel: “Larger, more complex worms are more useful. They eat large quantities of the blue tube worms. The toxin is much more concentrated in their bodies.”
Doog: “Wow, look at that thing.”
Nadel: “I see it.”
Doog: “So, toxins are good?”
Nadel: “Yes. I think so.”
Doog: “Why?”

Nadel: “I’m not sure. They are collected and shipped to Acus. They put them to some use.”
Doog: “How are they collected?”

Nadel: “Most of the toxins are in the sea-worm’s spines. They are easy to pull out.”
Doog: “If pulling out was any easier, I wouldn’t be a dad…allegedly.”
Nadel: “I don’t understand.”
Doog: “Don’t worry – I’m not sure I get it either sometimes. Back to the spines though, do you milk the toxins out or what?”
Nadel: “Oh, no. We have no contact with the spines. They are placed into safety containers and floated to the surface.”
Doog: “Ah, I see. That’s what that magnetic crane thing was for.”
Nadel: “I think.”

Doog: “I’m interested in this Acus facility. Why do they need toxins? Why do they need a support facility like the Needle?”
Nadel: “I don’t know.”
Doog: “They were rhetorical questions. Obviously, you wouldn’t know.”
Nadel: “I might be a few stars short of a galaxy, but I don’t think this one is my fault. The Acus facility is very secretive.”
Doog: “Fair enough.”

Doog: “Well folks, Acula is an ocean world with a single landform called the Needle. The Needle is full of communication equipment, power generators, and support facilities. The Needle uses this equipment to assist another facility on the nearby gas giant, Acus. We really don’t know what goes on there, but it has something to do with the toxin cultivated on Acula. Don’t fret folks. We’re visiting Acus next to get the full story. Until then, see ya!
 
Note:

Worker: “Dude, you need more fiber in your diet. You’ve been here so long; you might as well take my spot in radio telemetry.”
Worker #2: “Quit talking to me! It’s weird!”
Worker: “Trust me – it’s worse for me. Somedays, I wish I would be struck by lightning.”

CLICK HERE FOR NEXT EPISODE - Season 13 - Episode 9 - Acus

Credits
Created by: Ludgonious
Crew Member:  Jonathan Rivli