There are billions of stars, millions of planets, but there is only one man, Terrance McDoogal. Welcome to LIU Atlas.
LIU Atlas - Mola Rota
The Ludgonian Industrial Union's galaxy contains billions of stars and billions of planets. Unfortunately, most residents of the LIU could only name a handful of these worlds. In order to improve astronomy grades across the LIU, TV2 has started a new program called LIU Atlas. Follow our host, Terrance McDoogal, as he takes you on a tour across the LIU and some of its more obscure worlds.
Note: This episode is presented in full screen. The corresponding dialogue is underneath each photo.
Note: This episode is presented in full screen. The corresponding dialogue is underneath each photo.
Doog: “Welcome to another episode of LIU Atlas. I’m your host, Terrance “Doog” McDoogal. Today, we’re visiting the rainy ocean planet, Mola Rota. Mola Rota’s tropical heat and warm oceans produce tons of atmospheric moisture. This moisture condenses over Mola Rota’s mountainous island chains and falls as a heavy, continuous rain. On many of these islands, especially in the tropics, it never stops raining…ever. I’m headed to one such island.”
Doog: “Alright folks, I’ve been dropped off on one of Mola Rota’s islands. I’m in a small village near an agricultural field. It is, as expected, raining. As I mentioned before, that’s the norm here.”
Doog: “I’m told the constant rain is what keeps operations going here. Without it, neither the farming nor whatever they do with the crops would be possible. If it’s so important, though, I don’t know why they’re letting so much of it just run off down there. Most of the rain is draining away.”
Garrick: “The drainage system is what makes the Rotans such geniuses, Doog.”
Doog: “I’m assuming the Rotans are the locals and you’re my guide.”
Garrick: “Right on both accounts. I’m Garrick.”
Doog: “Hi, Garrick. So, how does wasting all this water make the Rotans geniuses?”
Garrick: “Well, for starters, it’s not being wasted. But, let’s not jump to that quite yet. Let’s start at the beginning. The Rotans have perfected farming in these rainy conditions.”
Doog: “How so?”
Garrick: “There’s so much rain here, it’s actually detrimental to farming. Roots can’t breathe, minerals wash away, and erosion is rampant. The Rotans solved this with terraced fields, gravity-based drains, and carefully designed runoff canals that guide the excess water safely away from the crops.”
Doog: “I guess that’s good, depending on what they’re farming. Anything good?”
Doog: “I’m assuming the Rotans are the locals and you’re my guide.”
Garrick: “Right on both accounts. I’m Garrick.”
Doog: “Hi, Garrick. So, how does wasting all this water make the Rotans geniuses?”
Garrick: “Well, for starters, it’s not being wasted. But, let’s not jump to that quite yet. Let’s start at the beginning. The Rotans have perfected farming in these rainy conditions.”
Doog: “How so?”
Garrick: “There’s so much rain here, it’s actually detrimental to farming. Roots can’t breathe, minerals wash away, and erosion is rampant. The Rotans solved this with terraced fields, gravity-based drains, and carefully designed runoff canals that guide the excess water safely away from the crops.”
Doog: “I guess that’s good, depending on what they’re farming. Anything good?”
Garrick: “Something great – Viridbaris.”
Doog: “Never heard of it. Is it a drug? A food? A medicine?”
Garrick: “A grain.”
Doog: “A grain? That’s boring.”
Garrick: “Boring? Grains are fundamental crops that are useful for many things.”
Doog: “Boring things like bread. How do the natives even eat bread in all this rain?”
Garrick: “Well, they…”
Doog: “Wait…I was just kidding! They really make bread?!”
Garrick: “Among other things. Viridbaris has a diversity of uses, like most grains.”
Doog: “Never heard of it. Is it a drug? A food? A medicine?”
Garrick: “A grain.”
Doog: “A grain? That’s boring.”
Garrick: “Boring? Grains are fundamental crops that are useful for many things.”
Doog: “Boring things like bread. How do the natives even eat bread in all this rain?”
Garrick: “Well, they…”
Doog: “Wait…I was just kidding! They really make bread?!”
Garrick: “Among other things. Viridbaris has a diversity of uses, like most grains.”
Garrick: “The Rotans, while primitive on the galactic scale, are pretty far advanced.”
Doog: “They make advanced bread?”
Garrick: “Honestly, they make terrible bread. It’s really hard. I considered them advanced because of their ingenuity. They use this abundance of water to power their industry.”
Doog: “Industry? Do they make raincoats?”
Doog: “They make advanced bread?”
Garrick: “Honestly, they make terrible bread. It’s really hard. I considered them advanced because of their ingenuity. They use this abundance of water to power their industry.”
Doog: “Industry? Do they make raincoats?”
Garrick: “No, they use the rain for power. The run-off canals fall down the mountain powering their industry via waterwheels.”
Doog: “Gravity pulls the water down, and that turns the wheels?”
Garrick: “Exactly.”
Doog: “And the turning wheel does what exactly?”
Garrick: “Let’s head inside.”
Doog: “Gravity pulls the water down, and that turns the wheels?”
Garrick: “Exactly.”
Doog: “And the turning wheel does what exactly?”
Garrick: “Let’s head inside.”
Garrick: “These wheels power mills. The mills process the Viridbaris into a flour.”
Doog: “This flour makes the hardened bread?”
Garrick: “Yes, Viridbaris flour is eventually turned into a rock-hard bread.”
Doog: “This flour makes the hardened bread?”
Garrick: “Yes, Viridbaris flour is eventually turned into a rock-hard bread.”
Garrick: “These mills run on gravity and the rainfall. The falling water turns the wheel, then flows on to power the next wheel mill – completely reusable, efficient, and clever. A smart system in these conditions.”
Doog: “An efficient way to make a useless flour.”
Garrick: “Useless?”
Doog: “Who wants to eat rock-hard bread?”
Doog: “An efficient way to make a useless flour.”
Garrick: “Useless?”
Doog: “Who wants to eat rock-hard bread?”
Garrick: “The Rotans seem to like it. It’s a staple of their diet.”
Doog: “How hard are we talking?”
Garrick: “See all these stones the Rotans use for building?”
Doog: “Yeah.”
Garrick: “Let’s just say that any of these stones could be replaced with Rotan bread and the structure wouldn’t lose any strength.”
Doog: “Literally rock-hard.”
Garrick: “Yes. Let’s head inside and see how they accomplish this.”
Doog: “How hard are we talking?”
Garrick: “See all these stones the Rotans use for building?”
Doog: “Yeah.”
Garrick: “Let’s just say that any of these stones could be replaced with Rotan bread and the structure wouldn’t lose any strength.”
Doog: “Literally rock-hard.”
Garrick: “Yes. Let’s head inside and see how they accomplish this.”
Garrick: “It starts off like any bakery. The flour is formed into a dough and shaped into a disk-like shape.”
Doog: “The dough frisbees look a lot bigger than the finished bread.”
Garrick: “That’s because they still have lots of moisture. That gets taken care of in the oven. The dough discs steam on a shelf above a fire. They stay there for nearly an hour until they shrink into these indestructible little pucks.”
Doog: “I see.”
Doog: “The dough frisbees look a lot bigger than the finished bread.”
Garrick: “That’s because they still have lots of moisture. That gets taken care of in the oven. The dough discs steam on a shelf above a fire. They stay there for nearly an hour until they shrink into these indestructible little pucks.”
Doog: “I see.”
Garrick: “If you weren’t aware of the conditions here, you would assume the Rotans are bad bakers, but that is not the case. This bread is hardened with purpose.”
Doog: “Why?”
Garrick: “The rain. All this moisture is bad for eating bread. Obviously, normal bread would disintegrate within minutes in this downpour. Rotan bread holds up just fine. It’s baked to be transported and eaten in the rain.”
Doog: “Rainproof bread. Got it.”
Garrick: “The process also keeps the bread from spoiling quickly. Mola Rota’s wet islands have all kinds of molds and bacteria that would quickly ruin normal bread.”
Doog: “Mold-proof. Rain-proof. Crush-proof. This is the galaxy’s most durable bread. What a planet…”
Garrick: “There’s more to Mola Rota than bread. I told you grains have multiple uses, right?”
Doog: “Do they make the galaxy’s most durable cereal too?”
Garrick: “No.”
Doog: “Unbreakable pasta?”
Garrick: “Still no.”
Doog: “Weapons-grade granola bars?”
Garrick: “You’re missing the point. The most important use of grain here isn’t food at all.”
Doog: “Not food? What else could you possibly make with grain? Do the Rotans make grain clothing? Hats? Shoes?”
Garrick: “You’re not even close, Doog. Beer. They make beer.”
Doog: “Why?”
Garrick: “The rain. All this moisture is bad for eating bread. Obviously, normal bread would disintegrate within minutes in this downpour. Rotan bread holds up just fine. It’s baked to be transported and eaten in the rain.”
Doog: “Rainproof bread. Got it.”
Garrick: “The process also keeps the bread from spoiling quickly. Mola Rota’s wet islands have all kinds of molds and bacteria that would quickly ruin normal bread.”
Doog: “Mold-proof. Rain-proof. Crush-proof. This is the galaxy’s most durable bread. What a planet…”
Garrick: “There’s more to Mola Rota than bread. I told you grains have multiple uses, right?”
Doog: “Do they make the galaxy’s most durable cereal too?”
Garrick: “No.”
Doog: “Unbreakable pasta?”
Garrick: “Still no.”
Doog: “Weapons-grade granola bars?”
Garrick: “You’re missing the point. The most important use of grain here isn’t food at all.”
Doog: “Not food? What else could you possibly make with grain? Do the Rotans make grain clothing? Hats? Shoes?”
Garrick: “You’re not even close, Doog. Beer. They make beer.”
Doog: “Beer?!”
Garrick: “Yeah. The locals call it Uredo. It’s another staple of the Rotan diet. Like their bread, Uredo holds ups well in these wet conditions. The alcohol in the Uredo keeps any mold and bacteria from forming. It’s safer to drink than the water.”
Doog: “And the Rotans just walk around hammered all the time?”
Garrick: “The Rotans don’t drink their beer like we do. It’s not consumed one after another to get inebriated. It’s a nutritional, high calorie beverage enjoyed only with meals.”
Doog: “But it could get you hammered if you drank it like normal beer, right?”
Garrick: “Of course. It has plenty of alcohol – more than most beers in this galaxy.”
Doog: “This beer is their export, right?”
Garrick: “Yes. Uredo is exported across the galaxy. It’s pretty popular.”
Doog: “There’s an intoxicating substance in this galaxy that’s popular, but somehow, I haven’t heard of it? I doubt it.”
Garrick: “You might not be familiar with Uredo, but it’s not called that off-world. It’s called Blight.”
Doog: “Blight Beer?! I have heard of that!”
Garrick: “I’m sure you’ve heard the slogan then. When life gives you rain…”
Doog: “…make beer. I always thought that had something to do with depression!”
Garrick: “Nope, it’s just describing beer from Mola Rota.”
Doog: “So, this is a brewery of some sort?”
Garrick: “Yes. Let’s head inside.”
Garrick: “Yeah. The locals call it Uredo. It’s another staple of the Rotan diet. Like their bread, Uredo holds ups well in these wet conditions. The alcohol in the Uredo keeps any mold and bacteria from forming. It’s safer to drink than the water.”
Doog: “And the Rotans just walk around hammered all the time?”
Garrick: “The Rotans don’t drink their beer like we do. It’s not consumed one after another to get inebriated. It’s a nutritional, high calorie beverage enjoyed only with meals.”
Doog: “But it could get you hammered if you drank it like normal beer, right?”
Garrick: “Of course. It has plenty of alcohol – more than most beers in this galaxy.”
Doog: “This beer is their export, right?”
Garrick: “Yes. Uredo is exported across the galaxy. It’s pretty popular.”
Doog: “There’s an intoxicating substance in this galaxy that’s popular, but somehow, I haven’t heard of it? I doubt it.”
Garrick: “You might not be familiar with Uredo, but it’s not called that off-world. It’s called Blight.”
Doog: “Blight Beer?! I have heard of that!”
Garrick: “I’m sure you’ve heard the slogan then. When life gives you rain…”
Doog: “…make beer. I always thought that had something to do with depression!”
Garrick: “Nope, it’s just describing beer from Mola Rota.”
Doog: “So, this is a brewery of some sort?”
Garrick: “Yes. Let’s head inside.”
Garrick: “This is where the magic happens. These tanks are filled with Viridbaris grain mash that was ground onsite by a mill. Brewmasters then mix the mash with water from the drainage canals.”
Doog: “I thought the water was full of mold and stuff.”
Garrick: “It is. One of these contaminates is beneficial though. It’s a fungal yeast called Uredo. Uredo eats the mash and converts it into alcohol.”
Doog: “And the alcohol kills the remaining contaminates?”
Garrick: “Exactly.”
Doog: “The locals call the drink Uredo after the alcohol making bacteria?”
Garrick: “Yes, but not bacteria – a fungal yeast.”
Doog: “I thought the water was full of mold and stuff.”
Garrick: “It is. One of these contaminates is beneficial though. It’s a fungal yeast called Uredo. Uredo eats the mash and converts it into alcohol.”
Doog: “And the alcohol kills the remaining contaminates?”
Garrick: “Exactly.”
Doog: “The locals call the drink Uredo after the alcohol making bacteria?”
Garrick: “Yes, but not bacteria – a fungal yeast.”
Garrick: “Blight gets its distinct flavor from other additives, like the leaves of the Viridbaris plant.”
Doog: “The green stuff in that cart?”
Garrick: “Yes. Of course, different regions have a few different additives, so you’ll taste a new Uredo or Blight on every island group.”
Doog: “I wasn’t aware there were more flavors. I’ve only seen standard Blight.”
Garrick: “The LIU didn’t want to ship out forty varieties of Blight, so they mix it all together and sell it as one product. Many distinctive regional flavors are lost in this process, but I guess it’s easier for the LIU.”
Doog: “The green stuff in that cart?”
Garrick: “Yes. Of course, different regions have a few different additives, so you’ll taste a new Uredo or Blight on every island group.”
Doog: “I wasn’t aware there were more flavors. I’ve only seen standard Blight.”
Garrick: “The LIU didn’t want to ship out forty varieties of Blight, so they mix it all together and sell it as one product. Many distinctive regional flavors are lost in this process, but I guess it’s easier for the LIU.”
Garrick: “Barrels and barrels of beer mash are made daily. This mash is then stored in waterproof caverns to age and develop their alcohol and taste.”
Doog: “Do I get to try some of this beer for, you know, reporting purposes?”
Garrick: “That can be arranged. We’ll need to head back into the brewery though.”
Doog: “Do I get to try some of this beer for, you know, reporting purposes?”
Garrick: “That can be arranged. We’ll need to head back into the brewery though.”
Garrick: “The Rotans have strong ties to their local breweries. They’re often the center of an island or region’s culture. Farmers, bakers, and workers of all sorts find themselves at the brewery at some point during the day – for work and for fun.”
Doog: “Fun? Do they get free beer or something?”
Garrick: “Not free, but Uredo is available here. All breweries on Mola Rota have little pubs built-in for selling meals. These pubs are social hangouts.”
Doog: “Meals…I keep forgetting the Rotans don’t drink this to get drunk.”
Doog: “Fun? Do they get free beer or something?”
Garrick: “Not free, but Uredo is available here. All breweries on Mola Rota have little pubs built-in for selling meals. These pubs are social hangouts.”
Doog: “Meals…I keep forgetting the Rotans don’t drink this to get drunk.”
Doog: “I, however, am not a Rotan. I will be drinking these until I can’t see straight.”
Garrick: “The first one is on me, but after that, you have to pay for whatever you’re drinking.”
Doog: “So much for that idea. I guess I’m drinking only for nourishment today.”
Garrick: “Cheers.”
Doog: “Cheers. Whoa that’s a bit thicker and more bitter than I was expecting.”
Garrick: “Good, huh? It’s nothing like the mixed, filtered, water-downed version the LIU sells.”
Doog: “Maybe I’m a bit of an uncultured simpleton, but I prefer the light galactic stuff to this authentic Blight. Every drink feels like I’m forcing a wet loaf of bread down my throat.”
Garrick: “Genuine Blight is an acquired taste and texture. Try to remember that it isn’t made to chug down over and over. It’s a liquid culinary experience, not a frat party.”
Doog: “I think I’ll stick to the stuff that makes me forget my problems, not feed me.”
Garrick: “To each their own.”
Garrick: “The first one is on me, but after that, you have to pay for whatever you’re drinking.”
Doog: “So much for that idea. I guess I’m drinking only for nourishment today.”
Garrick: “Cheers.”
Doog: “Cheers. Whoa that’s a bit thicker and more bitter than I was expecting.”
Garrick: “Good, huh? It’s nothing like the mixed, filtered, water-downed version the LIU sells.”
Doog: “Maybe I’m a bit of an uncultured simpleton, but I prefer the light galactic stuff to this authentic Blight. Every drink feels like I’m forcing a wet loaf of bread down my throat.”
Garrick: “Genuine Blight is an acquired taste and texture. Try to remember that it isn’t made to chug down over and over. It’s a liquid culinary experience, not a frat party.”
Doog: “I think I’ll stick to the stuff that makes me forget my problems, not feed me.”
Garrick: “To each their own.”
Doog: “Well folks, that’s Mola Rota. This rainy agricultural world is home to the Rotan race. They’ve evolved and adapted to this rainy planet in many ways. Their agriculture is terraced and full of drains. They use gravity and moving water to power their industries. Even the bread they eat and the beer they drink is modified for this wet world. A…ahem…slightly improved version of the Rotans’ Uredo, or Blight Beer, is exported across the galaxy. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to finish my lunch. Oh well, see ya!”
Note: The tropical islands of Mola Rota receive over a hundred feet of rain per year – more than some desert planets have seen in their entire history!
Note: The tropical islands of Mola Rota receive over a hundred feet of rain per year – more than some desert planets have seen in their entire history!
