Season 11 - Episode 7 - Nescius

There are billions of stars, millions of planets, but there is only one man, Terrance McDoogal. Welcome to LIU Atlas.

LIU Atlas - Nescius

The Ludgonian Industrial Union's galaxy contains billions of stars and billions of planets. Unfortunately, most residents of the LIU could only name a handful of these worlds. In order to improve astronomy grades across the LIU Galaxy, TV2 has started a new program called LIU Atlas. Follow our host, Terrance McDoogal, as he takes you on a tour across the LIU and some of its more obscure worlds.


Note: This episode is presented in full screen. The corresponding dialogue is underneath each photo.

Doog: “Welcome to another episode of LIU Atlas. I’m your host, Terrance ‘Doog” McDoogal. Today, we’re visiting the planet, Nescius. Nescius is large, terrestrial planet orbiting the star, Inscius. Nescius is classified as a jungle world. Thick, tropical forests cover much of the planet. One of these jungles, near the equator, is our destination. Let’s head on down.”

Doog: “Alright, folks. Welcome to the jungle. As far as jungles go, this one doesn’t seem too bad. The vegetation isn’t overly abundant. It’s probably because this part of the forest is inhabited. There’s a large structure, here, in front of me. I don’t see my guide, though.”

Doog: “I don’t see my guide, but I do see a variety of wildlife. There are tons of vibrant birds perched in the vegetation. They all have flashy tailfeathers. Keep on shaking it, birds! You'll get a lady one of these days!”

Doog: “Birds, trees, vines, and thousands of noisy bugs. They are super annoying. Add that to the list of reasons I don’t like insects.”

Galba: “Ooh, ooh. That’s a little harsh isn’t it? Perhaps you’re hanging around the wrong insects.”
Doog: “Holy Emperor! What are you?! I mean…uh…who are you?”
Galba: “I am Galba Ul. But, since you are my friend, you may call me Galba.”

Galba: “Speaking of our friendship, I believe it is customary to shake hands.”
Doog: “I’m not sure if…”
Galba: “Come on now, don’t leave me hanging. Get over here. No, no. Not that hand. This mechanical suit is not me; it is but a tool. My hands are in the front. Pick one!”
Doog: “If you insist…”
Galba: “Yes, yes. Ooh. That was nice. Shake another one if you like.”
Doog: “I think one handshake is enough. Things are already moving a bit too fast for me.”

Doog: “So, here we are. Two friends in the jungle.”
Galba: “Yes, yes. So exciting!”
Doog: “I think this is the part where you tell me about things. Like, where are we exactly?”
Galba: “This is the Awakening Center. It is a home for my people, built by the LIU. It is bigger than you would expect. It extends deep into the cliffside. Would you like to come in?”
Doog: “Anything to get away from these chirping bugs. No offense.”

Doog: “Why did the LIU build you a home?”
Galba: “It is a matter of arms. Ooh, yes. Arms.”
Doog: “Arms? Are you talking about weapons?”
Galba: “Ho, ho! No, silly. Anatomical arms. My species, while suitably intelligent, does not possess appendages capable of manipulating materials or developing technology. The LIU made us a home because we could not do it on our own. You need arms to build homes. Ooh, homes like this, anyway.”
Doog: “That makes sense. Arms would be useful in that regard.”
Galba: “Yes, ooh. The LIU eventually gave us mechanical arms. We can now interact with the world. Ooh, our sentience is purposeful now.”
Doog: “I see. I guess the real question is, why was the LIU motivated to assist your species?”

Galba: “The LIU’s motive is simple. We were not safe without a home. In the forests, we were susceptible to predation. Ooh, birds are pretty, but hungry.”
Doog: “The birds eat you?!”
Galba: “Our young mostly. Sometimes our dead. Ooh, but do not be mad. We are safe now.”
Doog: “Wait, is this some type of nursery?”
Galba: “Ooh! Wonderful way to describe it. Our home is where we raise our family safely. Each instar is safe within these walls.”

Doog: “Instar?”
Galba: “Does my friend not know of the stages?”
Doog: “No. I have no idea what you are talking about. Stages?”
Galba: “My species goes through five stages of development or instars: egg, larva, nymph, juvenile, and adult.”
Doog: “Ah, I remember that, now. That’s an insect-thing. Wait, are you an adult? Or, are you going to turn into some type of butterfly?”
Galba: “Ooh! Ho, ho! How beautiful I would be! But…no. I am not a caterpillar. I am an adult of my species.”
Doog: “Got it. What about these white spheres? Eggs, I presume?”
Galba: “Yes. Ooh, so safe in here. No pretty birds to eat them. Many more survive now.”
Doog: “So, that’s all this place is? A nursery?”
Galba: “Ho, ho! Not at all, friend. Let’s continue.”

Doog: “What the heck am I looking at here?”
Galba: “The sorting. Ooh, to be chosen.”
Doog: “What?”

Galba: “Sentience is relatively new development within my species. The gene for sentience is rare. Not all newborn larvae possess it.”
Doog: “Wait, some of your species is born without sentience.”
Galba: “Yes. Very few enjoy this gift. Only a small percent of my species emerges sentient. The gene is quite recessive.”

Doog: “So, earlier, when you said, ‘sorting’. You meant separating the sentient larvae from the insentient?”
Galba: “Ooh, perceptive, friend. With use of technology, it is now possible to determine sentience with genetics. We no longer have to wait until the juvenile instar. Ooh, ooh, praise to arms. Arms are great. Arms allow us to perform science.”
Doog: “I guess so.”

Galba: “You can see the brood differential here. Only two of the brood hold the sentience gene. Ooh, to be chosen. Two more gifts from the Infinite Father. Ooh. Oooooh. Oooooooh.”
Doog: “So, what happens now? You guys don’t get into the genocide or eugenics stuff, do you? The insentient aren’t murdered, are they?”
Galba: “Oh, ooh. Not at all. Even the unknowing deserve life. Both the sentient and insentient are fed and cared for identically, at least, until the juvenile instar.”

Galba: “Once our young enter the juvenile instar, their paths diverge. Our sentient children are educated. Ooh, it is an intense educational program. My race does not have the luxury of time. Our life expectancy is a mere thirty years. Ooh, to experience sentience for a century like humans do. Imagine the possibilities.”
Doog: “Not all humans live a hundred years. Especially not this one. Tacos, drugs, and brothels have lowered my expectancy to half that amount.”
Galba: “Ooh, oh. To possess such quantities of sentience and squander it away. It is a shame.”
Doog: “What good is sentience if you can’t enjoy yourself?”
Galba: “Perhaps, even a fleeting glimpse into experiencing the universe is enough. Countless living things never experience it.”
Doog: “Uh, things are getting a tad too deep for my tastes. I only like contemplating existence after doing drugs. I’m sober, here.”

Galba: “The insentient cannot be educated, but that does not make them purposeless.”
Doog: “Uh…what’s happening here? This is creepy.”

Galba: “Ooh, do not be uncomfortable. They are not in pain.”
Doog: “Maybe not, but why are they strapped into this column?”
Galba: “The insentient are not safe in the jungles. Ooh, they will die if not protected.”
Doog: “So, you incarcerate them?”
Galba: “Life or, ooh, death? Which is preferable? Insentient creatures always choose life. It is ingrained in their biology. They do everything to survive, ooh. Insentient life never purposely kills itself or makes dangerous lifestyle choices. Only sentient life chooses death. Ooh, ooh, like you and your tacos. Sentience defies biology. Sentient life can choose to die.”
Doog: “What does that have to do with worm jail?”
Galba: “Justification for imprisonment, ooh. We know that the unknowing would prefer life over death, even at great cost. It is our duty as sentients to protect the unknowing; aid them in their drive for survival.”

Doog: “Did you just say, ‘justification’? Justification for what?”
Galba: “The Infinite Father taught us to describe our actions as such. We, ooh, must preserve our species.”
Doog: “Yes, but people don’t say ‘justification’, unless there is an implication that the actions are not warranted. Are you getting something from the insentient?”

Galba: “Ooh, ooh. They are getting many resources from us: food, water, ooh, temperature control, antibiotics, and, of course, protection. In return, we take only the smallest from the unknowing.”
Doog: “So, that’s a ‘yes’.”

Galba: “Ooh, a very small donation is made by the insentient in a non-invasive, controlled manner.”
Doog: “They have tubes shoved into their heads! Looks pretty invasive!”
Galba: “Ooh, see reason, friend. The tube is not in their heads, but inserted into their pheromone gland located on the back of the neck.”
Doog: “Pheromone gland?”
Galba: “Yes, ooh. My species admits an aggregation pheromone when we find safe places. The pheromone tells others to come to the safe spot, ooh.”
Doog: “And…this is a safe place, so the insentient are emitting it.”
Galba: “Constantly, my friend.”
Doog: “What does the LIU want it for?”
Galba: “Our pheromone contains many useful organic chemicals, including many monoterpenes. Monoterpenes are used as ingredients in cosmetics, perfumes, artificial flavorings, ooh, and many anti-cancer medications.”
Doog: “That is some pretty useful neck juice. Creepy way to obtain it, though. Even creepier that you milk members of your own species for this stuff.”
Galba: “Many insects produce monoterpenes, but never at this scale. My species is much larger, ooh. Too good of an opportunity to ignore. Ooh, it’s a small repayment to the LIU for these arms and homes.” 

Doog: “Wait, do the sentient members of your species produce those pheromones too? Why aren’t you being milked?”
Galba: “Ooh, to be a juvenile again. I regret that my species ceases the emission of aggregation pheromones in the adult instar. Ooh, our size keeps us safe in this stage. No need to hide somewhere safe. The sentient juveniles do secrete aggregation pheromones, but they are much too busy to donate. School, ooh, is too important.”
Doog: “I guess that makes sense. Wait, what is done with the insentient adults?”
Galba: “The Infinite Father releases them to the wild. They are safe as adults.”
Doog: “Ok, hold on. I thought the ‘Infinite Father’ was some type of deity you guys worshiped. You’re telling me he is real?”
Galba: “Very real, ooh. The unending. The gifter of sentience. The Infinite Father. Ooh. You will meet him soon.”
Doog: “Is that where we are going?”
Galba: “Yes, ooh.”

Doog: “This is a very ‘ended’ father. This is a skeleton, Galba.”
Galba: “Ooh, patience. This is not the Infinite One. This is the Tomb of the First where the Awakened One slumbers.”
Doog: “The awakened one? Like the first to reach sentience?”
Galba: “Ooh! Yes! Very smart, friend. The Awakened One had the mutation that introduced sentience. His genetic ingenuity is responsible for our sentience. The Infinite Father be praised, ooh.”

Galba: “The Awakened One seeded many eggs. Many of his progeny achieved sentience.”
Doog: “The awakened guy got around, huh? Good for him. Game recognizes game.”
Galba: “Ooh, I don’t understand? Do you insult the Awoken?”
Doog: “No, not at all. I’m giving him props. Much respect.”
Galba: “I see, ooh.”

​Galba: “Ooh. Oooh. Ooooh! We are in his presence. Infinite Father, I am honored.”
Doog: “Hey, your father looks awfully familiar.”
Ab Gal: “Computer, initiate deep sleep protocol, specimen Galba.”
Computer: “Confirmed. Specimen Galba has been rendered safe.”
Ab Gal: “Thank you.”

Doog: “Hey! What did you do to Galba?!”
Ab Gal: “Nothing permanent. Galba has been rendered unconscious. His mechanical-suit
administered a memory suppressant. He mustn’t know what I’m about to communicate to you.”
Doog: “You don’t want him to know that you’re an Uplifter, right? I thought you guys were all on Nidavellir?”
Ab Gal: “We are wherever the LIU chooses.”
Doog: “His species never reached sentience, did they? You lifted them?”
Ab Gal: “Correct. The uplifted were necessary to harvest monoterpenes from the insentient. Insentient Nescium were distressed by other species. When approached, the insentient produced alarm pheromones instead of aggregation pheromones. The LIU realized that the aggregation pheromones could only be harvested by members of their own species. I was brought in to create sentient harvesters.”

Ab Gal: “I created the fifth instar to serve as collectors. The Nescium never advanced that far on their own.”
Doog; “So, the insentient ‘adult’ worms never get released into the wild after adolescence. They never exist.”
Ab Gal: “Correct, the insentient ‘juveniles’ are actually adults. They don’t get released. They donate pheromones until expiration.”

Ab Gal: “The true challenge to uplifting the Nescium was making the trait recessive. We did not want the entire race to advance.”
Doog: “Why?”
Ab Gal: “If the entire species gained sentience, there wouldn’t be anyone left to harvest.”
Doog: “I thought the sentient guys produced the pheromones too?”
Ab Gal: “They do, but they usually resist being locked into donation columns for their entire lives. As sentients, they are lawfully protected from being unjustly imprisoned. We needed the majority of the species to remain insentient.”
Doog: “I see.”
Ab Gal: “We tried alternatives, like lifting some of Nescius’ other species, but the results…”

Ab Gal: “…did not pan out.”
Birdman: “GWAA! GWAA!”
Ab Gal: “Quiet down bird brain!”
Birdman: “Sorry, boss. GWAA!”
Ab Gal: “Utterly useless…”

Doog: “Alright folks, that’s Nescius. How can I sum this one up? There are these worms, and they have valuable pheromones. Their pheromones are hard to collect though. They only release them when they feel safe. The Uplifters raised some of the worms into sentience, so they could harvest the insentient members of their species. It’s super weird, but somehow it makes sense. Oh well, see ya!”
 

Note: Need a team mascot? Having a children’s party? Are worms destroying your yard? Rent an Uplifted Birdman today! Some restrictions apply. Birdmen are sentient and therefore subject to free will.

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Credits
Created by: Ludgonious
Crew Member:  Jonathan Rivlin