There are billions of stars, millions of planets, but there is only one man, Terrance McDoogal. Welcome to LIU Atlas.
LIU Atlas - Deorsum
The Ludgonian Industrial Union's galaxy contains billions of stars and billions of planets. Unfortunately, most residents of the LIU could only name a handful of these worlds. In order to improve astronomy grades across the LIU Galaxy, TV2 has started a new program called LIU Atlas. Follow our host, Terrance McDoogal, as he takes you on a tour across the LIU and some of its more obscure worlds.
Note: This episode is presented in full screen. The corresponding dialogue is underneath each photo.
Note: This episode is presented in full screen. The corresponding dialogue is underneath each photo.
Doog: “Welcome to another episode of LIU Atlas. I’m your host, Terrance “Doog” McDoogal. Today, we’re visiting the planet, Deorsum. Deorsum is the closest planet to the Class-G star, Iusum. Deosum’s proximity to its star, its slow rotation, and minimal axial tilt have created permanent summertime conditions on the planet. Temperatures here usually exceed 50 degrees Celsius. It’s going to be a hot one.”
Doog: “It’s midmorning, and it is already way too hot. I’ve sweat through my deodorant already. Yikes. Despite the heat, there’s tons of plants here. There are grasslands as far as the eye can see. There’s also this snootily attired man standing behind me. I think he’s my guide.”
Doog: “What’s going on? Are you my guide?”
Chad: “Am I, Chadwick Pennington the Fourth, your guide? Do I look like a commoner? I’m the planet’s largest land owner, you foolish man.”
Doog: “Wow, sorry. I didn’t know you were so important. You look like you’re twelve.”
Chad: “I’m NOT a child! I’m a filthy rich, adult landowner that happens to take care of his skin.”
Doog: “Ok! Ok! No need to freak out. So, you own a lot of these grasslands?”
Chad: “I own about ninety percent of the planet, so yeah, you could say that. I’d own the whole damn planet if it wasn’t for the holdouts. Don’t worry, I’m coming for them some day. Then, Deorsum will be renamed, Chadwick Pennington the Fifth. After that, everyone will know how rich I am! Hoo-ha-ha-ha.”
Chad: “Am I, Chadwick Pennington the Fourth, your guide? Do I look like a commoner? I’m the planet’s largest land owner, you foolish man.”
Doog: “Wow, sorry. I didn’t know you were so important. You look like you’re twelve.”
Chad: “I’m NOT a child! I’m a filthy rich, adult landowner that happens to take care of his skin.”
Doog: “Ok! Ok! No need to freak out. So, you own a lot of these grasslands?”
Chad: “I own about ninety percent of the planet, so yeah, you could say that. I’d own the whole damn planet if it wasn’t for the holdouts. Don’t worry, I’m coming for them some day. Then, Deorsum will be renamed, Chadwick Pennington the Fifth. After that, everyone will know how rich I am! Hoo-ha-ha-ha.”
Doog: “You’re rich?”
Chad: “Are you not listening bonehead! I practically own an entire planet.”
Doog: “I know…it’s just something about your house.”
Chad: “What about my house!?”
Doog: “It’s so small. I’ve seen trailers and shacks bigger than this. Maybe you should buy less land and put a second room on this thing.”
Chad: “Imbecile! This isn’t my whole house! This is just a mudroom and a tanning deck. The rest of my house is below ground.”
Doog: “Below ground?”
Chad: “Duh! Most houses on Deorsum are underground to avoid the heat, stupid prole.”
Doog: “Got it. Well, if you’re not my guide, I think I’m done talking to you. It’s too hot to be put down by some whiny, ascot-wearing teenager.”
Chad: “I’m twenty-four!!”
Chad: “Are you not listening bonehead! I practically own an entire planet.”
Doog: “I know…it’s just something about your house.”
Chad: “What about my house!?”
Doog: “It’s so small. I’ve seen trailers and shacks bigger than this. Maybe you should buy less land and put a second room on this thing.”
Chad: “Imbecile! This isn’t my whole house! This is just a mudroom and a tanning deck. The rest of my house is below ground.”
Doog: “Below ground?”
Chad: “Duh! Most houses on Deorsum are underground to avoid the heat, stupid prole.”
Doog: “Got it. Well, if you’re not my guide, I think I’m done talking to you. It’s too hot to be put down by some whiny, ascot-wearing teenager.”
Chad: “I’m twenty-four!!”
Doog: “Yeah, sure. And…you have an underground mansion…”
Chad: “I do!”
Doog: “I don’t usually like dealing with robots over people, but I might make an exception. I think I’m going to leave you here at your hut. See ya, Chapstick Penny-Loafer the Fourth. Hope we never meet again!”
Chad: “You’re so infuriating! I am rich! I do have a mansion! I own everything you see!”
Doog: “Yeah, ok. Bye.”
Chad: “I’ll prove it. Hey you! Come here! Yes, you! Come over here right now!”
Chad: “I do!”
Doog: “I don’t usually like dealing with robots over people, but I might make an exception. I think I’m going to leave you here at your hut. See ya, Chapstick Penny-Loafer the Fourth. Hope we never meet again!”
Chad: “You’re so infuriating! I am rich! I do have a mansion! I own everything you see!”
Doog: “Yeah, ok. Bye.”
Chad: “I’ll prove it. Hey you! Come here! Yes, you! Come over here right now!”
Clarabelle: “Yes, Mr. Pennington? Are you speaking to me, sir?”
Chad: “Tell this distrusting vagabond how rich I am!”
Clarabelle: “Mr. Pennington is very wealthy man. He owns most of the planet.”
Chad: “See!”
Doog: “I believe. I believe. It’s too hot to debate. I’m dying out here. Can we please move on?”
Chad: “Ha! I win again!”
Doog: “You win. Now, can you direct me to my guide?”
Chad: “Oh yeah. I forgot why you were here. Um, robot, what is your designation?”
Clarabelle: “I’m Clarabelle, Mr. Pennington.”
Chad: “Clarabelle? Did we run out of numbers to assign? Ah forget it. Who cares? Show this guy around MY planet.”
Clarabelle: “Yes sir.”
Chad: “Tell this distrusting vagabond how rich I am!”
Clarabelle: “Mr. Pennington is very wealthy man. He owns most of the planet.”
Chad: “See!”
Doog: “I believe. I believe. It’s too hot to debate. I’m dying out here. Can we please move on?”
Chad: “Ha! I win again!”
Doog: “You win. Now, can you direct me to my guide?”
Chad: “Oh yeah. I forgot why you were here. Um, robot, what is your designation?”
Clarabelle: “I’m Clarabelle, Mr. Pennington.”
Chad: “Clarabelle? Did we run out of numbers to assign? Ah forget it. Who cares? Show this guy around MY planet.”
Clarabelle: “Yes sir.”
Doog: “I don’t know how you put up with that man. What a pretentious ascot-hole!”
Clarabelle: “I don’t deal with him often. He usually doesn’t speak with ‘the help’.”
Doog: “I guess being an inanimate robot has its perks. You’re lucky, Clarabelle.”
Clarabelle: “I’m not a robot.”
Doog: “Huh? You look like a robot. Are you inside that thing? How are you fitting in there? Are you super skinny?”
Clarabelle: “Oh, my bodies not in here. Just my mind.”
Doog: “Wait…you’ve been uploaded? Is this thing like a dream mech?”
Clarabelle: “You’re familiar with the process?”
Doog: “Too familiar.”
Clarabelle: “I won’t waste much time explaining it then. The fields of Deorsum are too hot for workers. Afternoon temperatures surpass 50 Celsius. Workers could probably survive the morning, but that’s not enough time to tend the fields. Instead, we upload into these Dream-Mechs. Our bodies slumber comfortably in the under-city while we work in this heat.”
Clarabelle: “I don’t deal with him often. He usually doesn’t speak with ‘the help’.”
Doog: “I guess being an inanimate robot has its perks. You’re lucky, Clarabelle.”
Clarabelle: “I’m not a robot.”
Doog: “Huh? You look like a robot. Are you inside that thing? How are you fitting in there? Are you super skinny?”
Clarabelle: “Oh, my bodies not in here. Just my mind.”
Doog: “Wait…you’ve been uploaded? Is this thing like a dream mech?”
Clarabelle: “You’re familiar with the process?”
Doog: “Too familiar.”
Clarabelle: “I won’t waste much time explaining it then. The fields of Deorsum are too hot for workers. Afternoon temperatures surpass 50 Celsius. Workers could probably survive the morning, but that’s not enough time to tend the fields. Instead, we upload into these Dream-Mechs. Our bodies slumber comfortably in the under-city while we work in this heat.”
Doog: “So, what crop is so important that dream-mechs are required?”
Clarabelle: “Rubha Shrubs.”
Doog: “Wait…are you saying ‘rubber’ with a bad accent? Or is it really Rubha Shrubs?”
Clarabelle: “It’s really Rubha. It’s not without coincidence though. I think they were named to mimic the sound of rubber.”
Doog: “Why do that?”
Clarabelle: “I guess because Chadwick Pennington the First wasn’t very imaginative, and the shrubs are used to make a rubber product.”
Doog: “I wish the original Pennington used some of those rubbers so we didn’t have to deal with his bigheaded great grandson.”
Clarabelle: “Ha! That’s funny. Rubha has an emulsion similar to latex, so that joke is perfect. However, Rubha is used to make more complex things than protection.”
Clarabelle: “Rubha Shrubs.”
Doog: “Wait…are you saying ‘rubber’ with a bad accent? Or is it really Rubha Shrubs?”
Clarabelle: “It’s really Rubha. It’s not without coincidence though. I think they were named to mimic the sound of rubber.”
Doog: “Why do that?”
Clarabelle: “I guess because Chadwick Pennington the First wasn’t very imaginative, and the shrubs are used to make a rubber product.”
Doog: “I wish the original Pennington used some of those rubbers so we didn’t have to deal with his bigheaded great grandson.”
Clarabelle: “Ha! That’s funny. Rubha has an emulsion similar to latex, so that joke is perfect. However, Rubha is used to make more complex things than protection.”
Doog: “Speaking of protection, how safe is it for us to be standing by this open hole in the ground?”
Anabelle: “For me, it’s super safe. My physical body is safe and sound. Probably not that safe for you, though.”
Doog: “That’s what I was thinking. Why is there a hole here anyway?”
Anabelle: “For me, it’s super safe. My physical body is safe and sound. Probably not that safe for you, though.”
Doog: “That’s what I was thinking. Why is there a hole here anyway?”
Clarabelle: “It’s an access point, connecting the surface to the under-city below.”
Doog: “Yeah, I heard you say under-city before. What’s that?”
Clarabelle: “It’s just like it sounds – a city below the surface of Deorsum where it’s much cooler.”
Doog: “You live in this under-city?”
Clarabelle: “Of course. All residents live below the surface. There’s nothing but Rubha plantations on the surface.”
Doog: “How do we get down there? Cooler sounds so good right now.”
Clarabelle: “Well, this access point is usually used to lower Rubha Fruits into the under-city. It’s not typically used for personnel. We might have to hike a mile or so to a dream-mech port.”
Doog: “Or…you could lower me down on that crane.”
Clarabelle: “That might work, if you’re up to it.”
Doog: “Oh, I’m up for it. I need out of this heat. The question is, is the crane up for it? I’m a little on the heavy side.”
Doog: “Yeah, I heard you say under-city before. What’s that?”
Clarabelle: “It’s just like it sounds – a city below the surface of Deorsum where it’s much cooler.”
Doog: “You live in this under-city?”
Clarabelle: “Of course. All residents live below the surface. There’s nothing but Rubha plantations on the surface.”
Doog: “How do we get down there? Cooler sounds so good right now.”
Clarabelle: “Well, this access point is usually used to lower Rubha Fruits into the under-city. It’s not typically used for personnel. We might have to hike a mile or so to a dream-mech port.”
Doog: “Or…you could lower me down on that crane.”
Clarabelle: “That might work, if you’re up to it.”
Doog: “Oh, I’m up for it. I need out of this heat. The question is, is the crane up for it? I’m a little on the heavy side.”
Clarabelle: “Are you doing ok?”
Doog: “I’m doing great. I'm more worried about the crane. Does it always make that noise?"
Clarabelle: "I think we might be testing its limits, but you should be ok."
Doog: "Well, if it breaks, at least I'll get to experience the coolness of the under-city for a few terrifying seconds before I die."
Clarabelle: "It's only fifteen feet down. You'll probably live."
Doog: "Not with my luck, Clarabelle. Not with my luck..."
Doog: “I’m doing great. I'm more worried about the crane. Does it always make that noise?"
Clarabelle: "I think we might be testing its limits, but you should be ok."
Doog: "Well, if it breaks, at least I'll get to experience the coolness of the under-city for a few terrifying seconds before I die."
Clarabelle: "It's only fifteen feet down. You'll probably live."
Doog: "Not with my luck, Clarabelle. Not with my luck..."
Doog: “I’m not going to lie; the under-city is a bit disappointing.”
Clarabelle: “How so?”
Doog: “Well, it is cooler than the surface, but it’s still pretty hot down here. I risked my life on that crane for almost no reason.”
Clarabelle: “We’re still pretty close to the surface. You can see the sun coming through the grates overhead. That being said, it’s still twenty degrees cooler down here.”
Doog: “Yeah, it’s definitely better, but in my mind, I was thinking the undercity was perfectly chilled with a big AC or something.”
Clarabelle: “Ha, no wonder you were disappointed. There’s definitely no air conditioning in the walkways. The cool air would just leak out.”
Clarabelle: “How so?”
Doog: “Well, it is cooler than the surface, but it’s still pretty hot down here. I risked my life on that crane for almost no reason.”
Clarabelle: “We’re still pretty close to the surface. You can see the sun coming through the grates overhead. That being said, it’s still twenty degrees cooler down here.”
Doog: “Yeah, it’s definitely better, but in my mind, I was thinking the undercity was perfectly chilled with a big AC or something.”
Clarabelle: “Ha, no wonder you were disappointed. There’s definitely no air conditioning in the walkways. The cool air would just leak out.”
Clarabelle: “Ah, we’re finally here. I need to re-dock my dream-mech and transfer back to my body. Give me five minutes and then meet me inside that door straight ahead.”
Doog: “Uh, sure. Five minutes. I definitely have a watch or other time keeping device. See ya then.”
Doog: “Uh, sure. Five minutes. I definitely have a watch or other time keeping device. See ya then.”
Clarabelle: “Wow, ha. You have no sense of time. It’s been like one minute.”
Doog: “Sorry, sorry. I’ll close my eyes.”
Clarabelle: “It’s ok. I have my upload jammies on. Good thing your sense of time was so far off. Another minute you might have caught me changing.”
Doog: “Dang! Even when I mess up, I can’t get it right! I mean…uh…sorry. I’ll be out in the hall. You come out when you’re finished.”
Clarabelle: “That’s probably our best bet.”
Doog: “Sorry, sorry. I’ll close my eyes.”
Clarabelle: “It’s ok. I have my upload jammies on. Good thing your sense of time was so far off. Another minute you might have caught me changing.”
Doog: “Dang! Even when I mess up, I can’t get it right! I mean…uh…sorry. I’ll be out in the hall. You come out when you’re finished.”
Clarabelle: “That’s probably our best bet.”
Doog: “It feels even better here. It’s almost room temperature. My sweat rate has dropped to twenty-five percent.”
Clarabelle: “The lower you descend, the better it feels.”
Doog: “Do you live down here?”
Clarabelle: “Nope. Dream-workers like myself usually live close to the surface. That’s where the upload machines are. They need to be close to the surface to ensure the signal gets out.”
Doog: “So, what’s down here?”
Clarabelle: “There’s plenty of workers here besides us dream-jockeys. There are factory workers, support staff, bot-repair mechanics, and so on. They live here in the mid-level of the under-city. We’re headed down even farther to the Rubha Processing Center.”
Clarabelle: “The lower you descend, the better it feels.”
Doog: “Do you live down here?”
Clarabelle: “Nope. Dream-workers like myself usually live close to the surface. That’s where the upload machines are. They need to be close to the surface to ensure the signal gets out.”
Doog: “So, what’s down here?”
Clarabelle: “There’s plenty of workers here besides us dream-jockeys. There are factory workers, support staff, bot-repair mechanics, and so on. They live here in the mid-level of the under-city. We’re headed down even farther to the Rubha Processing Center.”
Clarabelle: “Processing centers, like this, are dispersed amongst the under-city. Each processes the Rubha from its region.”
Doog: “What are they making again? Rubber?”
Clarabelle: “Rubha Fruits contain numerous fibers and an emulsifying sap. The combination creates a flexible, yet sturdy form of rubber called Deor. It’s used to make fuel lines, hoses, and even some garments.”
Doog: “What are they making again? Rubber?”
Clarabelle: “Rubha Fruits contain numerous fibers and an emulsifying sap. The combination creates a flexible, yet sturdy form of rubber called Deor. It’s used to make fuel lines, hoses, and even some garments.”
Clarabelle: “Delivery workers, that we call porters, transport Rubha Fruits from the access points to the factory. The fruits then get dropped into the grinder where they are smashed and shredded into pulp. This pulp contains the strong fibers and the emulsion sap.”
Clarabelle: “Special weaving machines turn the fibrous emulsion into long strands of Deor. The strands of Deor can be spun around a spool to be sold as is, but ..."
Clarabelle: "...this regional processing center takes it another step and weaves the strands into long hoses. Each regional processing center makes a different product though, so this might not be the same at each center.”
Doog: “Same basic idea though. Good enough for me.”
Doog: “Same basic idea though. Good enough for me.”
Doog: “Since we’ve returned to the heat, I’m guessing we’ve concluded the tour.”
Clarabelle: “I believe that’s everything.”
Doog: “Too bad, this was fun. It was much better than the beginning with Lord Heavy Petting or whatever his name was.”
Clarabelle: “Ha! It was fun, but maybe we should lay off Mr. Pennington. I have to stay here, unlike you.”
Doog: “Well, I don’t want to get you in trouble, but the guys a level seven douche.”
Clarabelle: “He’s a level ten boss!”
Doog: “Ok, that sounded forced, but I won’t press you any further.”
Clarabelle: “I believe that’s everything.”
Doog: “Too bad, this was fun. It was much better than the beginning with Lord Heavy Petting or whatever his name was.”
Clarabelle: “Ha! It was fun, but maybe we should lay off Mr. Pennington. I have to stay here, unlike you.”
Doog: “Well, I don’t want to get you in trouble, but the guys a level seven douche.”
Clarabelle: “He’s a level ten boss!”
Doog: “Ok, that sounded forced, but I won’t press you any further.”
Doog: “Well, that’s Deorsum. Workers here upload into machines to work the deadly hot grasslands. They collect Rubha to make strong rubbers. Rubbers to make hoses, not to protect hoses. That was a bad joke, but I’m so hot; I can’t think of anything better. Oh well! See ya!”
Note:
Note:
Wife #3: “What’s wrong Chadwick? Your game seems off.”
Chad: “My game is fine! I rule this planet!”
Wife #6: “Yes, my lord, but you’ve served three straight balls into the fan. What’s bothering you?”
Chad: “Why did I meet that inhuman TV host at my mudroom!? I looked so feeble! Why didn’t I meet him at my tennis court! Or my ballroom! Or my mansion!”
Chad: “My game is fine! I rule this planet!”
Wife #6: “Yes, my lord, but you’ve served three straight balls into the fan. What’s bothering you?”
Chad: “Why did I meet that inhuman TV host at my mudroom!? I looked so feeble! Why didn’t I meet him at my tennis court! Or my ballroom! Or my mansion!”
