There are billions of stars, millions of planets, but there is only one man, Terrance McDoogal. Welcome to LIU Atlas.
LIU Atlas - Murex
The Ludgonian Industrial Union's galaxy contains billions of stars and billions of planets. Unfortunately, most residents of the LIU could only name a handful of these worlds. In order to improve astronomy grades across the LIU Galaxy, TV2 has started a new program called LIU Atlas. Follow our host, Terrance McDoogal, as he takes you on a tour across the LIU and some of its more obscure worlds.
Note: This episode is presented in full screen. The corresponding dialogue is underneath each photo.
Note: This episode is presented in full screen. The corresponding dialogue is underneath each photo.
Doog: “Welcome to Season Thirteen of LIU Atlas. Today, we’re visiting Murex, a small planet in the Grex Cluster. Murex has some agriculture, but it’s more famous for its textile industry. This industry is based out of the planet’s largest city, Pannus. That’s where we’re headed.”
Doog: “Alright folks. When Season Twelve ended, the crew and I were given the option to stay anywhere within the Grex Cluster for two weeks. Most of the crew decided to stay with Amaya on Bulla Bulla, but Mike and I wanted to get a head start on the next season, so we decided to come here.”
Mike: “Was that a great decision? I guess we’ll find out.”
Doog: “What Mike’s trying to say is – we’re taking a bit of a risk. If we stayed with Amaya on Bulla Bulla, we could have stayed in one of her family’s condos for free, and we could have used our Season Twelve earnings however we saw fit.”
Mike: “But we didn’t want to stay on Bulla Bulla again. Been there done that.”
Doog: “It didn’t help that Bulla Bulla didn’t have any brothels.”
Mike: “That too. Mostly that.”
Doog: “So, we’ve come to this industrious little planet – with brothels – instead. That means we’ll need to find our own lodging and food. It can’t be that hard, can it?”
Mike: “Was that a great decision? I guess we’ll find out.”
Doog: “What Mike’s trying to say is – we’re taking a bit of a risk. If we stayed with Amaya on Bulla Bulla, we could have stayed in one of her family’s condos for free, and we could have used our Season Twelve earnings however we saw fit.”
Mike: “But we didn’t want to stay on Bulla Bulla again. Been there done that.”
Doog: “It didn’t help that Bulla Bulla didn’t have any brothels.”
Mike: “That too. Mostly that.”
Doog: “So, we’ve come to this industrious little planet – with brothels – instead. That means we’ll need to find our own lodging and food. It can’t be that hard, can it?”
Mike: “Pannus seems like a decent place.”
Doog: “Yeah, it’s not too bad.”
Mike: “So, what’s first? Finding an apartment? Getting some food? Checking out the brothel scene?”
Doog: “If we want to be wise with our money, we should probably check out the brothel scene first. We don’t want to get an apartment that’s miles away from the brothel. Taxi fare would eat into our budget. Let’s find the bordello that we’ll be spending most of our time at and then get an apartment nearby.”
Mike: “I can’t argue with that logic.”
Doog: “We’ll need to venture out a bit from this landing dock though. Everything is more expensive around the spaceport.”
Doog: “Yeah, it’s not too bad.”
Mike: “So, what’s first? Finding an apartment? Getting some food? Checking out the brothel scene?”
Doog: “If we want to be wise with our money, we should probably check out the brothel scene first. We don’t want to get an apartment that’s miles away from the brothel. Taxi fare would eat into our budget. Let’s find the bordello that we’ll be spending most of our time at and then get an apartment nearby.”
Mike: “I can’t argue with that logic.”
Doog: “We’ll need to venture out a bit from this landing dock though. Everything is more expensive around the spaceport.”
Mike: “The city has a lot of food vendors. That could be good for us.”
Doog: “It’s cheap and convenient – for sure – but I don’t think street-beef-stew is a good idea before the brothel.”
Mike: “What would I do without you? I never think of things like that.”
Doog: “Probably give the prostitutes nightmares.”
Mike: “Probably.”
Doog: “It’s cheap and convenient – for sure – but I don’t think street-beef-stew is a good idea before the brothel.”
Mike: “What would I do without you? I never think of things like that.”
Doog: “Probably give the prostitutes nightmares.”
Mike: “Probably.”
Doog: “Now this is what I’m talking about.”
Mike: “Brothels, bars, diners, and hotel rooms rentable by the hour.”
Doog: “This plaza might be all we need for the next few weeks.”
Mike: “The tattoo parlor scares me a bit, especially with the bars nearby. I don’t want to wake up with some random tattoo.”
Doog: “Let’s face it. We’re going to wake up with plenty of things we don’t want – tattoos, STD’s, hangovers…”
Mike: “Yeah, I guess. Well, what are we waiting for? Happy, Happy is calling our name.”
Doog: “That place looks too expensive. Clean? We’ll have pay extra for that. Let’s check out one of these smaller joints first.”
Mike: “Brothels, bars, diners, and hotel rooms rentable by the hour.”
Doog: “This plaza might be all we need for the next few weeks.”
Mike: “The tattoo parlor scares me a bit, especially with the bars nearby. I don’t want to wake up with some random tattoo.”
Doog: “Let’s face it. We’re going to wake up with plenty of things we don’t want – tattoos, STD’s, hangovers…”
Mike: “Yeah, I guess. Well, what are we waiting for? Happy, Happy is calling our name.”
Doog: “That place looks too expensive. Clean? We’ll have pay extra for that. Let’s check out one of these smaller joints first.”
Doog: “Like this place.”
Mike: “How do you know it’s a brothel? There are no signs written in ‘basic’.”
Doog: “I’m pretty sure that one sign says it’s a brothel. I’ve learned to read ‘brothel’ in several languages.”
Mike: “Fair enough.”
Mike: “How do you know it’s a brothel? There are no signs written in ‘basic’.”
Doog: “I’m pretty sure that one sign says it’s a brothel. I’ve learned to read ‘brothel’ in several languages.”
Mike: “Fair enough.”
Doog: “Oops. My bad. It said, ‘slots’. I was off by a letter.”
Mike: “Pannus has gambling?”
Doog: “I guess. It looks like a local variation of a slot machine.”
Mike: “This variation is really enticing. The lights and sounds are calling my name.”
Doog: “Me too. I can’t look away.”
Mike: “We could afford Happy, Happy if we win big.”
Doog: “We could.”
Mike: “Pannus has gambling?”
Doog: “I guess. It looks like a local variation of a slot machine.”
Mike: “This variation is really enticing. The lights and sounds are calling my name.”
Doog: “Me too. I can’t look away.”
Mike: “We could afford Happy, Happy if we win big.”
Doog: “We could.”
Doog: “I feel a big win coming soon. I just have to keep playing.”
Mike: “It better come real soon. We’ve blown through most of our money.”
Doog: “Wait! How much have you lost?”
Mike: “I’ve lost almost everything. I’m down to fifty credits.”
Doog: “Me too! We need to stop!”
Mike: “But how will we win our money back?”
Doog: “We’re going to be homeless for the next two weeks if we keep going.”
Mike: “Then why do you keep pressing the button?”
Doog: “I don’t know. The pretty lights tell me to do it.”
Mike: “Let’s get out of here!”
Mike: “It better come real soon. We’ve blown through most of our money.”
Doog: “Wait! How much have you lost?”
Mike: “I’ve lost almost everything. I’m down to fifty credits.”
Doog: “Me too! We need to stop!”
Mike: “But how will we win our money back?”
Doog: “We’re going to be homeless for the next two weeks if we keep going.”
Mike: “Then why do you keep pressing the button?”
Doog: “I don’t know. The pretty lights tell me to do it.”
Mike: “Let’s get out of here!”
Mike: “There goes our plans for the next two weeks.”
Doog: “Don’t give up yet. We still have a handful of credits between us. We can make this work.”
Mike: “How?”
Doog: “Don’t give up yet. We still have a handful of credits between us. We can make this work.”
Mike: “How?”
Doog: “There’s a pawn shop next to that tattoo shop.”
Mike: “We only have the clothes on our back. Unless you plan on selling that microphone?”
Doog: “Never!”
Mike: “Then the pawn shop won’t help us.”
Doog: “We can find a nice dumpster and live there. That way, we can save the remaining credits for brothels.”
Mike: “I’m not opposed to the dumpster plan, but I’m not sure we’ll get into places like, Happy, Happy, smelling like garbage.”
Mike: “We only have the clothes on our back. Unless you plan on selling that microphone?”
Doog: “Never!”
Mike: “Then the pawn shop won’t help us.”
Doog: “We can find a nice dumpster and live there. That way, we can save the remaining credits for brothels.”
Mike: “I’m not opposed to the dumpster plan, but I’m not sure we’ll get into places like, Happy, Happy, smelling like garbage.”
Doog: “There are several bars around here. Maybe we rely on our good looks and charm. We don’t pay for the ladies – we earn them.”
Mike: “That might work today, but once we start selling like dumpsters…I think we’re in trouble.”
Doog: “Well, let’s do it.”
Mike: “That might work today, but once we start selling like dumpsters…I think we’re in trouble.”
Doog: “Well, let’s do it.”
Mike: “Comet Bar. Drinks look cheap. It’s not too crowded. Let’s try this place.”
Doog: “Turning my Doog Charm up to maximum.”
Doog: “Turning my Doog Charm up to maximum.”
Doog: “And turning it off.”
Mike: “What? Why?”
Doog: “There’s only one human female here, and she already has a dozen guys around her. I don’t like those odds.”
Mike: “We could try another bar?”
Doog: “Or…”
Mike: “What? Why?”
Doog: “There’s only one human female here, and she already has a dozen guys around her. I don’t like those odds.”
Mike: “We could try another bar?”
Doog: “Or…”
Doog: “…we could invest our remaining credits into this beautiful, flashing machine.”
Mike: “The lights say we’ll win.”
Doog: “Indeed.”
Mike: “The lights say we’ll win.”
Doog: “Indeed.”
Doog: “It’s official. We’re destitute vagrants for the next two weeks.”
Mike: “We don’t even have a cup to beg for change.”
Doog: “Time to sniff out a dumpster-home. If we’re lucky, it will be near a restaurant, and we can eat scraps.”
Mike: “Can we call Amaya for help?”
Doog: “We can’t let her know we messed up this quick. I don’t want to hear her say – you should have stayed on Bulla Bulla – in that scolding tone of hers.”
Mike: “We don’t even have a cup to beg for change.”
Doog: “Time to sniff out a dumpster-home. If we’re lucky, it will be near a restaurant, and we can eat scraps.”
Mike: “Can we call Amaya for help?”
Doog: “We can’t let her know we messed up this quick. I don’t want to hear her say – you should have stayed on Bulla Bulla – in that scolding tone of hers.”
Mike: “Do we really have to live in a dumpster?”
Doog: “Well, we could find a nice box. I’m not sure about the weather here.”
Mike: “It’s temperate with occasional rain.”
Doog: “See, a dumpster is just better. Once you get used to the smell, it’s almost like a home. Wait…how did you know about the weather?”
Mike: “I always look up the places we’re going to visit. Will I need a jacket? A respirator?”
Doog: “So, you know a little bit about Murex.”
Mike: “I know the basics.”
Doog: “I think I have an idea that might just save us.”
Doog: “Well, we could find a nice box. I’m not sure about the weather here.”
Mike: “It’s temperate with occasional rain.”
Doog: “See, a dumpster is just better. Once you get used to the smell, it’s almost like a home. Wait…how did you know about the weather?”
Mike: “I always look up the places we’re going to visit. Will I need a jacket? A respirator?”
Doog: “So, you know a little bit about Murex.”
Mike: “I know the basics.”
Doog: “I think I have an idea that might just save us.”
Mike: “If it means sleeping in a real bed, I’m all ears.”
Doog: “We came here under the premise that we’re getting a head start on the next season.”
Mike: “Yeah, but we just said that so we can splurge on hookers for two weeks.”
Doog: “But, what if we really shot an episode. With your pre-trip research, we can easily turn some of this footage into an episode.”
Mike: “I guess. How does that help us?”
Doog: “If we make an episode while we’re here, we can get paid. Amaya will transfer us some credits for the episode in advance.”
Mike: “That could work.”
Doog: “We came here under the premise that we’re getting a head start on the next season.”
Mike: “Yeah, but we just said that so we can splurge on hookers for two weeks.”
Doog: “But, what if we really shot an episode. With your pre-trip research, we can easily turn some of this footage into an episode.”
Mike: “I guess. How does that help us?”
Doog: “If we make an episode while we’re here, we can get paid. Amaya will transfer us some credits for the episode in advance.”
Mike: “That could work.”
Doog: “So, Mike. What can you tell us about Murex, specifically Pannus?”
Mike: “Um, it’s a multicultural factory town that specializes in textiles.”
Doog: “Yeah, that’s been well established. Can’t you add anything else?”
Mike: “There’s lots of food vendors everywhere.”
Doog: “We’ve already talked about that too. We need new material.”
Mike: “Sorry, my research wasn’t that extensive. Also, it smells good here, and I’m starving.”
Doog: “We’re really going to starve if we can’t make an episode.”
Mike: “Um, it’s a multicultural factory town that specializes in textiles.”
Doog: “Yeah, that’s been well established. Can’t you add anything else?”
Mike: “There’s lots of food vendors everywhere.”
Doog: “We’ve already talked about that too. We need new material.”
Mike: “Sorry, my research wasn’t that extensive. Also, it smells good here, and I’m starving.”
Doog: “We’re really going to starve if we can’t make an episode.”
Mike: “We need to find a local or something. My research isn’t going to be enough to make an episode.”
Doog: “You’ve never been good at making things up. Here, watch me. It looks like we’re in an open-air-market that sells fabric and fruit?”
Mike: “Fruit?”
Doog: “I don’t know what those things are. Ok, so it’s not that easy.”
Doog: “You’ve never been good at making things up. Here, watch me. It looks like we’re in an open-air-market that sells fabric and fruit?”
Mike: “Fruit?”
Doog: “I don’t know what those things are. Ok, so it’s not that easy.”
Doog: “Hey, what are you selling?”
Local: “Licium, 65 credits per kilo. I offer free shipping to any factory within Pannus.”
Doog: “Licium? What’s it used for?”
Local: “What do you mean? You can use it however you want. Use it to make purple dye. Extract the fibers to make purple fabric. Eat it if you’re into that kind of thing. Do you want it or not?”
Doog: “No thanks. We don’t have any money.”
Local: “Wow, thanks for wasting my time off-worlder.”
Local: “Licium, 65 credits per kilo. I offer free shipping to any factory within Pannus.”
Doog: “Licium? What’s it used for?”
Local: “What do you mean? You can use it however you want. Use it to make purple dye. Extract the fibers to make purple fabric. Eat it if you’re into that kind of thing. Do you want it or not?”
Doog: “No thanks. We don’t have any money.”
Local: “Wow, thanks for wasting my time off-worlder.”
Doog: “Alright. We’re getting somewhere now. We’ll get some stock footage and do a voiceover. Murex is home to a plant called Licium. It’s grown in the countryside and shipped into big towns like Pannus. Here, it’s used to make cotton-like fabric and purple dye.”
Local: “Why are you still talking to me?”
Local: “Why are you still talking to me?”
Doog: “We’re making some progress. We need some factory shots and some looks at the final products, but I think we have enough for now.”
Mike: “So, we contact Amaya now?”
Doog: “Yeah, I think we have enough footage to get an advance on this episode’s salary.”
Mike: “So, we contact Amaya now?”
Doog: “Yeah, I think we have enough footage to get an advance on this episode’s salary.”
Doog: “There’s an E-Café up ahead with Wi-Fi. We can contact her from there.”
Mike: “Don’t you have to buy things to use the Wi-Fi?”
Doog: “Maybe. I’ll stay in line and pretend to order while you make contact.”
Doog: “Maybe. I’ll stay in line and pretend to order while you make contact.”
Doog: “Remember. Don’t tell her about the brothels or the gambling. Our plan was to make an episode this whole time.”
Mike: “Got it.”
Mike: “Got it.”
Doog: “What did she say?”
Mike: “I’m pretty sure the Hover Cam sold us out. She knew everything that’s happened.”
Doog: “We have to stop bringing this thing everywhere.”
Mike: “Yeah, so she’s not giving us any advance. She’s afraid we’ll gamble it away. She’s gathering up the crew. They’ll be here in a week. We’re on our own until then.”
Doog: “Can you use the Wi-Fi to search for nearby dumpsters?”
Mike: “I already tried. You can’t.”
Mike: “I’m pretty sure the Hover Cam sold us out. She knew everything that’s happened.”
Doog: “We have to stop bringing this thing everywhere.”
Mike: “Yeah, so she’s not giving us any advance. She’s afraid we’ll gamble it away. She’s gathering up the crew. They’ll be here in a week. We’re on our own until then.”
Doog: “Can you use the Wi-Fi to search for nearby dumpsters?”
Mike: “I already tried. You can’t.”
Doog: “We can’t let her win. Even though we’re homeless and penniless, we’re finishing this episode.”
Mike: “I’m game. We don’t have anything else to do. Well, look for dumpsters and beg for food, but we can do that later.”
Doog: “Exactly. Let’s check out these factories and finish this episode.”
Mike: “Maybe one of these factories have a nice industrial-size dumpster.”
Doog: “Ooh, luxury accommodations. I like it.”
Mike: “I’m game. We don’t have anything else to do. Well, look for dumpsters and beg for food, but we can do that later.”
Doog: “Exactly. Let’s check out these factories and finish this episode.”
Mike: “Maybe one of these factories have a nice industrial-size dumpster.”
Doog: “Ooh, luxury accommodations. I like it.”
Mike: “Ok. We’re in. Is this the part where we make stuff up again?”
Doog: “It sure is. It looks like the fruits…what are they again?”
Mike: “Licium.”
Doog: “It looks like the Licium gets broken down into its fibers in those tanks. The fibrous purple goo gets sent to some type of weaving machine. The machine turns it into sheets of fabric.”
Mike: “I couldn’t have said it better myself.”
Doog: “I’m not sure what these things are in front of us.”
Mike: “They look like ironing stations. The fabric gets neatly pressed before being boxed.”
Doog: “It sure is. It looks like the fruits…what are they again?”
Mike: “Licium.”
Doog: “It looks like the Licium gets broken down into its fibers in those tanks. The fibrous purple goo gets sent to some type of weaving machine. The machine turns it into sheets of fabric.”
Mike: “I couldn’t have said it better myself.”
Doog: “I’m not sure what these things are in front of us.”
Mike: “They look like ironing stations. The fabric gets neatly pressed before being boxed.”
Foreman: “Are you two here for the steam ironing job?”
Mike: “No, we’re actually…”
Doog: “Wait! What does it pay?”
Foreman: “Five credits daily plus you get to stay in one of our worker dorms.”
Doog: “We’re the guys. When do we start?”
Mike: “No, we’re actually…”
Doog: “Wait! What does it pay?”
Foreman: “Five credits daily plus you get to stay in one of our worker dorms.”
Doog: “We’re the guys. When do we start?”
Mike: “Are we really going to iron fabric for the next week?”
Doog: “It’s better than living in a dumpster.”
Mike: “Is it? This job sucks.”
Doog: “Maybe, but five credits a day plus free housing. We might just salvage a brothel visit.”
Mike: “Let the ironing commence.”
Doog: “It’s better than living in a dumpster.”
Mike: “Is it? This job sucks.”
Doog: “Maybe, but five credits a day plus free housing. We might just salvage a brothel visit.”
Mike: “Let the ironing commence.”
Mike: “Five hours is a half-day? That means we have to work ten hours a day the rest of the week.”
Doog: “Two and half credits a piece though. That’s more than we had five hours ago.”
Mike: “Speak for yourself. I only got two credits. The rest went to the taxi.”
Doog: “Well, I wasn’t going to walk.”
Mike: “Then you should have paid for the taxi!”
Doog: “Two and half credits a piece though. That’s more than we had five hours ago.”
Mike: “Speak for yourself. I only got two credits. The rest went to the taxi.”
Doog: “Well, I wasn’t going to walk.”
Mike: “Then you should have paid for the taxi!”
Doog: “This place isn’t so bad. We each have a bed, and it smells better than a dumpster.”
Mike: “There’s no food in the kitchen. Some of our daily salary is going to have to go towards food.”
Doog: “That might hurt the brothel budget. Is there anything not nailed down that we can pawn?”
Mike: “I don’t see anything.”
Doog: “Even the chairs are nailed down.”
Mike: “There’s no food in the kitchen. Some of our daily salary is going to have to go towards food.”
Doog: “That might hurt the brothel budget. Is there anything not nailed down that we can pawn?”
Mike: “I don’t see anything.”
Doog: “Even the chairs are nailed down.”
Mike: “We can’t sell the bathroom door, because there isn’t one.”
Doog: “Having no door is bad enough, but did we really need the only bathroom wall to be glass?”
Mike: “This place is just one notch above a dumpster.”
Doog: “It is, but we need to keep the end goal in mind. We suffer now for the brothel later.”
Doog: “Having no door is bad enough, but did we really need the only bathroom wall to be glass?”
Mike: “This place is just one notch above a dumpster.”
Doog: “It is, but we need to keep the end goal in mind. We suffer now for the brothel later.”
Mike: “And the food situation?”
Doog: “I think we still hit up the garbage cans.”
Mike: “If we’re working ten hours and dumpster diving tomorrow, I’m going to bed now. I’ll need my rest.”
Doog: “I’m going to stay up for a bit.”
Doog: “I think we still hit up the garbage cans.”
Mike: “If we’re working ten hours and dumpster diving tomorrow, I’m going to bed now. I’ll need my rest.”
Doog: “I’m going to stay up for a bit.”
Computer: “Power shutoff initiated. Your ten minutes of daily allotted energy have expired.”
Doog: “Or not. Well folks, this isn’t the best way to start off the season. Mike and I had our dreams for a mini-vacation destroyed. I guess it’s our own fault. We shouldn’t have gambled our money away. Those machines were too addicting. Well, I guess we did learn a little about Murex. They grow…something.”
Mike: “Licium.”
Doog: “Yeah, licium. These plants are turned into textiles in nearby factories. They are also used to make purple dyes. Speaking of factories, Mike and I are now factory workers for the next six days. Good times. Oh well, see ya!”
Note: Doog and Mike fell short of their lofty brothel goals after being fired on day #3. Impromptu steam fights are not allowed on the factory floor. Both were briefly hospitalized after eating dumpster food, but they are expected to make a full recovery.
Doog: “Or not. Well folks, this isn’t the best way to start off the season. Mike and I had our dreams for a mini-vacation destroyed. I guess it’s our own fault. We shouldn’t have gambled our money away. Those machines were too addicting. Well, I guess we did learn a little about Murex. They grow…something.”
Mike: “Licium.”
Doog: “Yeah, licium. These plants are turned into textiles in nearby factories. They are also used to make purple dyes. Speaking of factories, Mike and I are now factory workers for the next six days. Good times. Oh well, see ya!”
Note: Doog and Mike fell short of their lofty brothel goals after being fired on day #3. Impromptu steam fights are not allowed on the factory floor. Both were briefly hospitalized after eating dumpster food, but they are expected to make a full recovery.
