There are billions of stars, millions of planets, but there is only one man, Terrance McDoogal. Welcome to LIU Atlas.
LIU Atlas - Arens Frux
The Ludgonian Industrial Union's galaxy contains billions of stars and billions of planets. Unfortunately, most residents of the LIU could only name a handful of these worlds. In order to improve astronomy grades across the LIU Galaxy, TV2 has started a new program called LIU Atlas. Follow our host, Terrance McDoogal, as he takes you on a tour across the LIU and some of its more obscure worlds.
Note: This episode is presented in full screen. The corresponding dialogue is underneath each photo.
Note: This episode is presented in full screen. The corresponding dialogue is underneath each photo.
Doog: “Welcome to another episode of LIU Atlas. I’m your host, Terrance ‘Doog” McDoogal. Today, we’re visiting the dry, desert world of Arens Frux. Arens Frux orbits the intrinsically variable star, Arenti. Arenti’s luminosity and power output varies as it pulsates. These pulses drive changes in Arens Frux’s weather. Let’s head down and check it out.”
Doog: “Alright, I’ve landed outside a small settlement called Thlath. The air is a bit dry here, but it’s not too hot. I briefly stared at the planet’s sun, but I didn’t note any major variations. I do see dark blotches now. Hope that goes away soon. Oh well, let’s look for my guide.”
Jaf: “Are you Doog?”
Doog: “I am. Who are you?”
Jaf: “You can call me Jaf.”
Doog: “Jaf? That’s an odd name.”
Jaf: “Says the man called Doog.”
Doog: “Touché.”
Jaf: “Jaf is the name given to me by the locals. It means foreigner in their language. I sort of like it, so I go by Jaf now.”
Doog: “Gotcha. Well, Jaf, what do you do here?”
Jaf: “I’m a Procurement Specialist for the Elite.”
Doog: “You’re a what?”
Jaf: “A Procurement Specialist. I visit little backwoods worlds, like Arens Frux, and pick up goods for Elite citizens.”
Doog: “Why don’t the locals ship stuff out on their own?”
Doog: “I am. Who are you?”
Jaf: “You can call me Jaf.”
Doog: “Jaf? That’s an odd name.”
Jaf: “Says the man called Doog.”
Doog: “Touché.”
Jaf: “Jaf is the name given to me by the locals. It means foreigner in their language. I sort of like it, so I go by Jaf now.”
Doog: “Gotcha. Well, Jaf, what do you do here?”
Jaf: “I’m a Procurement Specialist for the Elite.”
Doog: “You’re a what?”
Jaf: “A Procurement Specialist. I visit little backwoods worlds, like Arens Frux, and pick up goods for Elite citizens.”
Doog: “Why don’t the locals ship stuff out on their own?”
Jaf: “Arens Frux, and some of the other worlds I visit, don’t have booming economies. The LIU has invested very little here. They have some interesting things to offer, but it can’t be scaled up to the galactic scale.”
Doog: “So the locals can’t mass produce their product or good.”
Jaf: “Exactly.”
Doog: “What kind of goods are we talking about?”
Doog: “So the locals can’t mass produce their product or good.”
Jaf: “Exactly.”
Doog: “What kind of goods are we talking about?”
Jaf: “The locals, known as the Frux, have many things to offer, but the most interesting is their food.”
Doog: “Food? I’m listening.”
Jaf: “Yes, the Frux make several products from Kyseti, the native grain here.”
Doog: “Is that what all these tall plants are?”
Jaf: “Yep. Kyseti is very heat tolerant. It doesn’t need a lot of water either.”
Doog: “I’m a little less excited about the food aspect, now that I know revolves around grain.”
Jaf: “You’d be surprised what you can make from Kyseti. The elite want it for a reason. Head into the blue building on the right.”
Doog: “Food? I’m listening.”
Jaf: “Yes, the Frux make several products from Kyseti, the native grain here.”
Doog: “Is that what all these tall plants are?”
Jaf: “Yep. Kyseti is very heat tolerant. It doesn’t need a lot of water either.”
Doog: “I’m a little less excited about the food aspect, now that I know revolves around grain.”
Jaf: “You’d be surprised what you can make from Kyseti. The elite want it for a reason. Head into the blue building on the right.”
Jaf: “The obvious choice for using grain is to make bread.”
Doog: “Oh joy. How exotic…”
Jaf: “Yeah, ok. Breads not too exciting. I get it. But, it is the dietary staple for the Frux. They eat lots of it.”
Doog: “Oh joy. How exotic…”
Jaf: “Yeah, ok. Breads not too exciting. I get it. But, it is the dietary staple for the Frux. They eat lots of it.”
Doog: “It’s not something you get for the elite, is it?”
Jaf: “Heavens no. Kyseti bread is incredibly dry. It’s almost like eating a spoonful of sand.”
Doog: “That sounds terrible.”
Jaf: “It is. Besides, the Frux have three stomachs to process the bread. You wouldn’t hold up well if you ate it yourself.”
Doog: “I can only imagine what a spoonful of sand feels like coming out the other end.”
Jaf: “Thanks for that image. Shall we continue?”
Jaf: “Heavens no. Kyseti bread is incredibly dry. It’s almost like eating a spoonful of sand.”
Doog: “That sounds terrible.”
Jaf: “It is. Besides, the Frux have three stomachs to process the bread. You wouldn’t hold up well if you ate it yourself.”
Doog: “I can only imagine what a spoonful of sand feels like coming out the other end.”
Jaf: “Thanks for that image. Shall we continue?”
Jaf: “So, as you’ve discovered, Kyseti isn’t all that great on its own. It needs heavy processing to be turned into edible products.”
Doog: “What sort of processing are we talking about?”
Jaf: “You’ll see. Let’s head below ground.”
Doog: “Below ground?”
Jaf: “Yep. The entrance to underground aquifer is just ahead.”
Doog: “What sort of processing are we talking about?”
Jaf: “You’ll see. Let’s head below ground.”
Doog: “Below ground?”
Jaf: “Yep. The entrance to underground aquifer is just ahead.”
Doog: “Wow, there’s tons of water down here. I didn’t expect this on a desert world.”
Jaf: “Yes, it is quite rare. The planet has several large aquifers. All are located underground where they are protected from the heat.”
Doog: “I’m guessing that the aquifers are non-renewable. Obviously, rain isn’t replenishing them.”
Jaf: “That’s where you’d be wrong. The planet’s star, Arenti, is a pulsating variable star. As it expands and contracts, its luminosity and power output changes. Every five months, the star cools enough for clouds to form, and the planet experiences a brief rainy season.”
Doog: “If it rains on a desert planet, is it truly a desert planet?”
Jaf: “We’re not talking about a monsoon season. It’s a light drizzle, here and there, for a few weeks.”
Jaf: “Yes, it is quite rare. The planet has several large aquifers. All are located underground where they are protected from the heat.”
Doog: “I’m guessing that the aquifers are non-renewable. Obviously, rain isn’t replenishing them.”
Jaf: “That’s where you’d be wrong. The planet’s star, Arenti, is a pulsating variable star. As it expands and contracts, its luminosity and power output changes. Every five months, the star cools enough for clouds to form, and the planet experiences a brief rainy season.”
Doog: “If it rains on a desert planet, is it truly a desert planet?”
Jaf: “We’re not talking about a monsoon season. It’s a light drizzle, here and there, for a few weeks.”
Doog: “Wow, that was a long way down. I’m not looking forward to the return trip.”
Jaf: “The descent is about twenty feet. The Thlath Aquifer is one of the closet aquifers to the surface. You lucked out, we could have met at the Hubub Aquifer. It’s about fifty feet down from the surface.”
Doog: “If that were the case, that aquifer would be my new home. I’d never return to the surface. Speaking of which, are we going back up or are we just going to stand here and stare at the water?”
Jaf: “Oh, we’re not going up quite yet.”
Jaf: “The descent is about twenty feet. The Thlath Aquifer is one of the closet aquifers to the surface. You lucked out, we could have met at the Hubub Aquifer. It’s about fifty feet down from the surface.”
Doog: “If that were the case, that aquifer would be my new home. I’d never return to the surface. Speaking of which, are we going back up or are we just going to stand here and stare at the water?”
Jaf: “Oh, we’re not going up quite yet.”
Doog: “Do we really need a boat?”
Jaf: “Would you rather swim?”
Doog: “Well, no. I wouldn’t mind wading though. It would be a nice way to cool off.”
Jaf: “Ha. There’s no wading in this pool. Don’t let the shadowy water fool your eyes, it’s way deeper than think. A fifty-foot giant is the only thing wading here.”
Doog: “Boat it is, then. I didn’t realize it was that deep.”
Jaf: “It’s long too. Almost a full mile. It runs the length of the town.”
Doog: “It’s safe to say the locals aren’t running out of water anytime soon.”
Jaf: “Indeed.”
Jaf: “Would you rather swim?”
Doog: “Well, no. I wouldn’t mind wading though. It would be a nice way to cool off.”
Jaf: “Ha. There’s no wading in this pool. Don’t let the shadowy water fool your eyes, it’s way deeper than think. A fifty-foot giant is the only thing wading here.”
Doog: “Boat it is, then. I didn’t realize it was that deep.”
Jaf: “It’s long too. Almost a full mile. It runs the length of the town.”
Doog: “It’s safe to say the locals aren’t running out of water anytime soon.”
Jaf: “Indeed.”
Doog: “I’m not going to lie. It’s a bit freaky down here. There’s little light and almost no sound, other than our voices and the splash of the paddles.”
Jaf: “Yep, and the echo will get to you after a while too. Trust me.”
Doog: “Why are we down here again?”
Jaf: “Yep, and the echo will get to you after a while too. Trust me.”
Doog: “Why are we down here again?”
Jaf: “The Frux rely on these aquifers for survival. Obviously, they offer water and shelter, but they also provide something else.”
Doog: “Swimming pools? Romantic gondola rides?”
Jaf: “No, they offer a food source.”
Doog: “I was so close. I few more guesses, and I would have had it.”
Doog: “Swimming pools? Romantic gondola rides?”
Jaf: “No, they offer a food source.”
Doog: “I was so close. I few more guesses, and I would have had it.”
Doog: “What kind of food? Fish? Crabs?”
Jaf: “I’ll just tell you. There’s no way you can guess.”
Doog: “So, it’s something weird. I need to guess weird things. Taco eels? Fruxian Frankfurter Snails?”
Jaf: “What! How did you know!”
Doog: “Wait! I was right?”
Jaf: “No, not even close.”
Jaf: “I’ll just tell you. There’s no way you can guess.”
Doog: “So, it’s something weird. I need to guess weird things. Taco eels? Fruxian Frankfurter Snails?”
Jaf: “What! How did you know!”
Doog: “Wait! I was right?”
Jaf: “No, not even close.”
Jaf: “The aquifers have a unique species of bacteria.”
Doog: “They eat bacteria? That’s their food source? You’re right. I never would have guessed that.”
Jaf: “Well, they don’t eat it directly. It’s used to convert Kyseti into something more edible.”
Doog: “Ah, that explains the chute with Kyseti sliding down it.”
Jaf: “Yes. Kyseti is sent down into maturation chambers, like this. Water, containing the bacteria, is pumped up into the tank. The ultra-dry Kyseti absorbs the bacteria rich waters.”
Doog: “And, somehow, a bacterial infection makes it more edible?”
Jaf: “In a way. Follow me.”
Doog: “They eat bacteria? That’s their food source? You’re right. I never would have guessed that.”
Jaf: “Well, they don’t eat it directly. It’s used to convert Kyseti into something more edible.”
Doog: “Ah, that explains the chute with Kyseti sliding down it.”
Jaf: “Yes. Kyseti is sent down into maturation chambers, like this. Water, containing the bacteria, is pumped up into the tank. The ultra-dry Kyseti absorbs the bacteria rich waters.”
Doog: “And, somehow, a bacterial infection makes it more edible?”
Jaf: “In a way. Follow me.”
Jaf: “The hydrated Kyseti is removed from the tank after a few days. The bacteria in the water has started to break it down. It’s now this soggy, red stalk.”
Doog: “I see. It smells like old beer or the carpet in a college frat house. Wait…do they make beer? Is that why you carried a bottle with you this whole time? Are you holding out on me Jaf?!”
Jaf: “No. I carry this bottle, of water, so I don’t have to drink the bacteria water here. Also, they don’t make beer. They make cheese.”
Doog: “Cheese! That’s random. They feed this fermenting Kyseti to cows?”
Jaf: “No, the cheese is made from the Kyseti.”
Doog: “I see. It smells like old beer or the carpet in a college frat house. Wait…do they make beer? Is that why you carried a bottle with you this whole time? Are you holding out on me Jaf?!”
Jaf: “No. I carry this bottle, of water, so I don’t have to drink the bacteria water here. Also, they don’t make beer. They make cheese.”
Doog: “Cheese! That’s random. They feed this fermenting Kyseti to cows?”
Jaf: “No, the cheese is made from the Kyseti.”
Doog: “I don’t want to embarrass you, but cheese is made from milk.”
Jaf: “Cheese is made from the protein, casein. It’s commonly found in milk, yes, but it is also found in Kyseti. Plant milk, if you will.”
Doog: “Impossible.”
Jaf: “It’s not impossible. It’s happening right here in front of you. The Frux extract the plant sap or plant milk by crushing it up.”
Doog: “That has got to be the worst cheese ever made. Grain cheese? Are you kidding me!”
Jaf: “It’s pretty good. The elite seem to like it.”
Doog: “That’s what you’re here getting! Plant cheese!”
Jaf: “Let’s keep going. Maybe I’ll let you try some.”
Doog: “I’ll come, but I don’t know about trying any.”
Jaf: “Cheese is made from the protein, casein. It’s commonly found in milk, yes, but it is also found in Kyseti. Plant milk, if you will.”
Doog: “Impossible.”
Jaf: “It’s not impossible. It’s happening right here in front of you. The Frux extract the plant sap or plant milk by crushing it up.”
Doog: “That has got to be the worst cheese ever made. Grain cheese? Are you kidding me!”
Jaf: “It’s pretty good. The elite seem to like it.”
Doog: “That’s what you’re here getting! Plant cheese!”
Jaf: “Let’s keep going. Maybe I’ll let you try some.”
Doog: “I’ll come, but I don’t know about trying any.”
Doog: “There was another entrance right next to the cheese-making? Why did we bother going down the other entrance?”
Jaf: “And skip the boat ride? That’s the best part. Besides, I wanted to show the architecture and grain chute. We would have gone out of order if we used this entrance.”
Doog: “Vegetarian cheese and long cuts don’t make Doog happy.”
Jaf: “You’re still bothered by the whole cheese thing? Why does it matter? If it’s delicious, who cares what it is made of?”
Jaf: “And skip the boat ride? That’s the best part. Besides, I wanted to show the architecture and grain chute. We would have gone out of order if we used this entrance.”
Doog: “Vegetarian cheese and long cuts don’t make Doog happy.”
Jaf: “You’re still bothered by the whole cheese thing? Why does it matter? If it’s delicious, who cares what it is made of?”
Doog: “I don’t know. If plants can be cheese, what other things can they be? Steak, bacon, tacos…my whole world has been turned upside down. I don’t know if I can identify as a carnivore anymore.”
Jaf: “Are you have an identity crisis over plant cheese?”
Doog: “I think I am.”
Jaf: “Are you have an identity crisis over plant cheese?”
Doog: “I think I am.”
Jaf: “Kyseti sap is processed in the same manner as milk. Separation of curds and whey, pressing, coagulating. All that cheese stuff. I’m a Procurement Specialist, not a cheese expert.”
Doog: “It smells really sour. I’m having second thoughts about trying this Kyseti Cheese.”
Jaf: “I think that smells coming from the whey, not the cheese.”
Doog: “Coming from which way?”
Jaf: “No, the whey. They liquid cheese byproduct.”
Jaf: “I think that smells coming from the whey, not the cheese.”
Doog: “Coming from which way?”
Jaf: “No, the whey. They liquid cheese byproduct.”
Jaf: “There. There’s the final product, Kyseti cheese.”
Doog: “Looks like cheese. But, will it taste like cheese?”
Doog: “Looks like cheese. But, will it taste like cheese?”
Jaf: “Ooh, this is some fresh stuff. I’ll be able to mark this way up.”
Doog: “What do you mean?”
Jaf: “I buy this stuff for cheap from the Frux. I can get a few cheese wedges per credit. I then turn around and sell this stuff to the elite for five to ten credits a wedge. That’s where I make my profit, and how I survive.”
Doog: “That sounds lucrative.”
Jaf: “It’s not too bad. Of course, the cheese seasons match the rain seasons here. So, I can’t rely solely on Arens Frux. I have a few other worlds I hit up from time to time.”
Doog: “Why didn’t I think of this? As much as I travel the galaxy, I could easily be part-time Procurement Specialist.”
Jaf: “Yeah, maybe. Just stay out of my territories.”
Doog: “What do you mean?”
Jaf: “I buy this stuff for cheap from the Frux. I can get a few cheese wedges per credit. I then turn around and sell this stuff to the elite for five to ten credits a wedge. That’s where I make my profit, and how I survive.”
Doog: “That sounds lucrative.”
Jaf: “It’s not too bad. Of course, the cheese seasons match the rain seasons here. So, I can’t rely solely on Arens Frux. I have a few other worlds I hit up from time to time.”
Doog: “Why didn’t I think of this? As much as I travel the galaxy, I could easily be part-time Procurement Specialist.”
Jaf: “Yeah, maybe. Just stay out of my territories.”
Jaf: “As promised, here’s some cheese for you.”
Doog: “Smells ok. Texture is good. Hmm, this is amazing. Wow, I must reexamine my whole life now. Can plants offer something worthwhile, after all?”
Jaf: “It’s just cheese, Doog. Settle down.”
Doog: “Smells ok. Texture is good. Hmm, this is amazing. Wow, I must reexamine my whole life now. Can plants offer something worthwhile, after all?”
Jaf: “It’s just cheese, Doog. Settle down.”
Doog: “Well folks, Arens Frux was an eye-opening experience. Apparently, the planet’s native grain, Kyseti, can be manufactured into a type of cheese. A really good cheese, too. Professional buyers, like Jaf, come here to obtain the cheese for the galaxy’s rich and elite. I’m thinking about grabbing a few wedges for the road, some to eat and some to sell.”
Jaf: “Too late, I just bought out this whole shop.”
Doog: “Dang it! Oh well, at least I can enjoy this piece. See ya later!”
Note:
Kyseti cheese is spoil resistant, staying edible for many years. The Frux make and store the cheese for periods of extended drought or famine, when Kyseti Bread may not be available. Recently, the Frux have begun to sell off this safety net to make more money for HoloTV’s and subspace communicators. Experts believe the Frux are now susceptible to an extinction-level crop failure.
Jaf: “Too late, I just bought out this whole shop.”
Doog: “Dang it! Oh well, at least I can enjoy this piece. See ya later!”
Note:
Kyseti cheese is spoil resistant, staying edible for many years. The Frux make and store the cheese for periods of extended drought or famine, when Kyseti Bread may not be available. Recently, the Frux have begun to sell off this safety net to make more money for HoloTV’s and subspace communicators. Experts believe the Frux are now susceptible to an extinction-level crop failure.
