There are billions of stars, millions of planets, but there is only one man, Terrance McDoogal. Welcome to LIU Atlas.
LIU Atlas - Pila
The Ludgonian Industrial Union's galaxy contains billions of stars and billions of planets. Unfortunately, most residents of the LIU could only name a handful of these worlds. In order to improve astronomy grades across the LIU Galaxy, TV2 has started a new program called LIU Atlas. Follow our host, Terrance McDoogal, as he takes you on a tour across the LIU and some of its more obscure worlds.
Note: This episode is presented in full screen. The corresponding dialogue is underneath each photo.
Note: This episode is presented in full screen. The corresponding dialogue is underneath each photo.
Doog: “Welcome to another episode of LIU Atlas. I’m your host, Terrance “Doog” McDoogal. Today, we’re visiting the unique planet, Pila. Pila is an ‘eyeball planet’, a class of tidally-locked ice planets that look like eyeballs. The side of the planet that is always facing Pila’s star is devoid of ice, creating the illusion of a pupil and iris. This warmer section is habitable, so let’s head on down.”
Doog: “Alright, this is Pila’s surface. Despite the unending sunshine on this side of the planet, it’s not too hot. Like most tidally locked planets, there’s big thermal differences between the day and night hemispheres. Strong winds, created by these differing hemispheres, even out the temperature. That was just a long way of saying it is temperate and breezy.”
Galen: “Hey, I thought I heard someone out here. You must be Doog.”
Doog: “The one and only. And you are?”
Galen: “I’m Dr. Galen Alcamaeon.”
Doog: “Doc Alca-mayo is way too hard to say. Galen it is.”
Galen: “That’s fine with me.”
Doog: “So, what do you do here on the surface of this eyeball?”
Doog: “The one and only. And you are?”
Galen: “I’m Dr. Galen Alcamaeon.”
Doog: “Doc Alca-mayo is way too hard to say. Galen it is.”
Galen: “That’s fine with me.”
Doog: “So, what do you do here on the surface of this eyeball?”
Galen: “Well, I do lots of things. For starters, I’m a water harvester. Meltwater from Pila’s ice shell is plentiful here on the dayside. The aquifers around here are loaded with pure clean water. I collect it, bottle it, and sell it.”
Doog: “Waterboy. Got it. Really putting that doctorate to work.”
Galen: “More importantly, I’m a researcher, a xenobiologist, and a first contact expert. My doctorates came in handy for this aspect of my job.”
Doog: “Yeah, I might have spoken too soon. Why bother with the water thing, if you have all these other more important jobs?”
Galen: “Water harvesting is easy. It’s mostly automated. Besides that, it’s my primary source of income. Science doesn’t pay the bills unless you make a profitable discovery.”
Doog: “Waterboy. Got it. Really putting that doctorate to work.”
Galen: “More importantly, I’m a researcher, a xenobiologist, and a first contact expert. My doctorates came in handy for this aspect of my job.”
Doog: “Yeah, I might have spoken too soon. Why bother with the water thing, if you have all these other more important jobs?”
Galen: “Water harvesting is easy. It’s mostly automated. Besides that, it’s my primary source of income. Science doesn’t pay the bills unless you make a profitable discovery.”
Doog: “What, hopefully profitable, sciences are you working on?”
Galen: “I’m focusing mostly on biology. Pila has numerous unique species, including a sentient species.”
Doog: “I’m guessing these annoying, growling dog-like things aren’t the sentient beings?”
Galen: “Of course not. I named these Brutalines. They are an aggressive and dangerous species that hunt in packs.”
Doog: “Are they’re afraid of us? Why aren’t we being attacked?”
Galen: “They certainly are not afraid of us. We would be getting mauled right now, if not for they shock barricade.”
Doog: “Shock barricade?”
Galen: “These pylons you see all around us. If an alien creature gets too close, they strike it with an electrical blast. Over the years, they have learned not to come too close. Keep that in mind as we tour this planet. You’re in danger if you’re not by a pylon.”
Doog: “Stay close to shock poles or die gruesome death. I will try to remember.”
Galen: “I’m focusing mostly on biology. Pila has numerous unique species, including a sentient species.”
Doog: “I’m guessing these annoying, growling dog-like things aren’t the sentient beings?”
Galen: “Of course not. I named these Brutalines. They are an aggressive and dangerous species that hunt in packs.”
Doog: “Are they’re afraid of us? Why aren’t we being attacked?”
Galen: “They certainly are not afraid of us. We would be getting mauled right now, if not for they shock barricade.”
Doog: “Shock barricade?”
Galen: “These pylons you see all around us. If an alien creature gets too close, they strike it with an electrical blast. Over the years, they have learned not to come too close. Keep that in mind as we tour this planet. You’re in danger if you’re not by a pylon.”
Doog: “Stay close to shock poles or die gruesome death. I will try to remember.”
Galen: “Pila has an abundance of unique plants. The most dominate are these Pila Trees.”
Doog: “I like their white leaves.”
Galen: “It’s quite striking isn’t it. It serves a purpose too. The white foliage helps reflect back some of the sunlight. Growing in never-ending sunlight is not easy.”
Doog: “I like their white leaves.”
Galen: “It’s quite striking isn’t it. It serves a purpose too. The white foliage helps reflect back some of the sunlight. Growing in never-ending sunlight is not easy.”
Galen: “The plants are just the beginning of the food chain. Small rodent-like creatures, called Muckrats, eat Pila’s smaller plants.”
Doog: “Must pet cute rats.”
Galen: “NO! Stay by the pylons!”
Doog: “Oops, forgot that already.”
Doog: “Must pet cute rats.”
Galen: “NO! Stay by the pylons!”
Doog: “Oops, forgot that already.”
Galen: “Muckrats are the primary food source of the Brutalines. It’s a solid bet that you’ll find Brutalines anytime there’s Muckrats.”
Doog: “Yikes. Thanks for stopping me from petting those little guys. I might have died.”
Doog: “Yikes. Thanks for stopping me from petting those little guys. I might have died.”
Galen: “No problem. I just wish I had a guide when I first got here. I might still have my lower legs.”
Doog: “Brutalines ate your legs off!?”
Galen: “Tore them off. Probably ate them. I’m not sure. I passed out.”
Doog: “How are you still alive?”
Galen: “I was saved by the sentient beings. They killed the Brutalines that were attacking me.”
Doog: “It makes you realize how tough the natives must be.”
Galen: “They are strong and fearless. They have pretty good camouflage too. They’re ambush hunters.”
Doog: “I bet I could find one.”
Galen: “You haven’t yet.”
Doog: “We haven’t come across any yet.”
Galen: “You’re wrong. Look up on the ridge there.”
Doog: “Brutalines ate your legs off!?”
Galen: “Tore them off. Probably ate them. I’m not sure. I passed out.”
Doog: “How are you still alive?”
Galen: “I was saved by the sentient beings. They killed the Brutalines that were attacking me.”
Doog: “It makes you realize how tough the natives must be.”
Galen: “They are strong and fearless. They have pretty good camouflage too. They’re ambush hunters.”
Doog: “I bet I could find one.”
Galen: “You haven’t yet.”
Doog: “We haven’t come across any yet.”
Galen: “You’re wrong. Look up on the ridge there.”
Doog: “I don’t see anything. Oh. Wait. I do. There’s a native up there.”
Galen: “There’s three actually. They’re hard to see when they are still.”
Galen: “There’s three actually. They’re hard to see when they are still.”
Galen: “We call them the Pili. These masterful hunters are still in the beginning stages of development. They have tools, clothes, and have began domesticating animals. They have a rudimentary language, but no writing system.”
Doog: “Are they friendly? I mean, they saved you, right?”
Galen: “They are friendly to an extent. They saved me when they killed that Brutaline Pack. I like to think they did it to save me, but it was probably because they naturally hunt Brutalines. Their reaction to me was pretty dismissive.”
Doog: “Are they friendly? I mean, they saved you, right?”
Galen: “They are friendly to an extent. They saved me when they killed that Brutaline Pack. I like to think they did it to save me, but it was probably because they naturally hunt Brutalines. Their reaction to me was pretty dismissive.”
Galen: “Of course, they have grown more friendly as our interactions increase.”
Doog: “What about me? Are they going to like me?”
Galen: “I’m not sure. Just stay close to the pylons.”
Doog: “The pylons work on the Pili too?”
Galen: “Of course.”
Doog: “Having trails of shock pylons doesn’t disturb the wildlife or natives? You’ve essentially cut their territory in half.”
Galen: “The pylons only activate when in proximity to an off-worlder. They are off otherwise.”
Doog: “What about me? Are they going to like me?”
Galen: “I’m not sure. Just stay close to the pylons.”
Doog: “The pylons work on the Pili too?”
Galen: “Of course.”
Doog: “Having trails of shock pylons doesn’t disturb the wildlife or natives? You’ve essentially cut their territory in half.”
Galen: “The pylons only activate when in proximity to an off-worlder. They are off otherwise.”
Galen: “The Pili live in social groups of about three to six individuals. Surprisingly, most individuals are not related. These groups are a collection of the best hunters. If you come across a more proficient hunter, you bring them into your group and expel the weakest.”
Doog: “That’s brutal.”
Galen: “It is, but surrounding yourself with the best individuals ensures your safety. This grouping system has driven the evolution of the Pili. Only the strongest survive and breed.”
Doog: “That’s brutal.”
Galen: “It is, but surrounding yourself with the best individuals ensures your safety. This grouping system has driven the evolution of the Pili. Only the strongest survive and breed.”
Doog: “Is that guy in the back the leader? I see he has different markings.”
Galen: “That’s the dominate female. Her body markings change indicating that she is capable of breeding.”
Doog: “Why is she surrounded by Muckrats?”
Galen: “Good question. We believe the Pili are in the early stages of domesticating Muckrats.”
Doog: “For what? Eating? Or as pets?”
Galen: “As bait.”
Doog: “Bait?”
Galen: “Brutalines are attracted to Muckrats, and the Pila eat Brutalines. We believe they are breeding Muckrats to be less timid. If they’ll stay near the den, food will come to the Pili. It’s also advantageous for the Muckrats. They stay safe as long as they are near the Pili.”
Doog: “Interesting.”
Galen: “It is. The Pili truly prize their little Muckrats. They aren’t cheap to trade for.”
Doog: “You trade for Muckrats?”
Galen: “That’s the dominate female. Her body markings change indicating that she is capable of breeding.”
Doog: “Why is she surrounded by Muckrats?”
Galen: “Good question. We believe the Pili are in the early stages of domesticating Muckrats.”
Doog: “For what? Eating? Or as pets?”
Galen: “As bait.”
Doog: “Bait?”
Galen: “Brutalines are attracted to Muckrats, and the Pila eat Brutalines. We believe they are breeding Muckrats to be less timid. If they’ll stay near the den, food will come to the Pili. It’s also advantageous for the Muckrats. They stay safe as long as they are near the Pili.”
Doog: “Interesting.”
Galen: “It is. The Pili truly prize their little Muckrats. They aren’t cheap to trade for.”
Doog: “You trade for Muckrats?”
Galen: “To help advance the Pili and get them ready for galactic inclusion, I’ve been slowly teaching them new concepts. An important part of our galaxy is trade. They must learn trade.”
Doog: “Got it. Uh…Hey! How’s it going Pili.”
Pili: “Who Galen?”
Galen: “This is Doog.”
Pili: “Why dog?”
Doog: “It’s Doog.”
Pili: “Why Doog?”
Doog: “It’s short for McDoogal.”
Galen: “I think he means why are you here. Doog is helping. Helping Galen trade.”
Pili: “Galen trade Doog?”
Galen: “No. Galen no trade Doog. Galen trade coins.”
Pili: “No like coin.”
Doog: “Got it. Uh…Hey! How’s it going Pili.”
Pili: “Who Galen?”
Galen: “This is Doog.”
Pili: “Why dog?”
Doog: “It’s Doog.”
Pili: “Why Doog?”
Doog: “It’s short for McDoogal.”
Galen: “I think he means why are you here. Doog is helping. Helping Galen trade.”
Pili: “Galen trade Doog?”
Galen: “No. Galen no trade Doog. Galen trade coins.”
Pili: “No like coin.”
Galen: “Coin has worth.”
Pili: “Coin not help, Pili.”
Galen: “Coin will help Pili. Pili can buy from Galen with coin in the future.”
Pili: “Galen only have coin. Galen never have help.”
Galen: “When Galen visit in future, Galen bring help.”
Pili: “What Galen help?”
Galen: “Galen bring food. Pili trade coins for food.”
Doog: “I want food and coins. What do I have to do?”
Pili: “Pili want food now.”
Galen: “Pili need more coins for food. Trade now for coin and Galen returns with food.”
Pili: “Pili trade for coin. Pili give Zanchibi.”
Galen: “Two Zanchibi.”
Pili: “One. Pili trade one.”
Galen: “It’s a deal.”
Doog: “I have no idea what’s happening here.”
Galen: “I’m teaching them to trade and to use currency. It will help them and the LIU in the future.”
Doog: “How so?”
Pili: “Coin not help, Pili.”
Galen: “Coin will help Pili. Pili can buy from Galen with coin in the future.”
Pili: “Galen only have coin. Galen never have help.”
Galen: “When Galen visit in future, Galen bring help.”
Pili: “What Galen help?”
Galen: “Galen bring food. Pili trade coins for food.”
Doog: “I want food and coins. What do I have to do?”
Pili: “Pili want food now.”
Galen: “Pili need more coins for food. Trade now for coin and Galen returns with food.”
Pili: “Pili trade for coin. Pili give Zanchibi.”
Galen: “Two Zanchibi.”
Pili: “One. Pili trade one.”
Galen: “It’s a deal.”
Doog: “I have no idea what’s happening here.”
Galen: “I’m teaching them to trade and to use currency. It will help them and the LIU in the future.”
Doog: “How so?”
Galen: “Eventually, the Pili can take over the water harvesting industry. These are not ideal conditions for outsiders. There’s dangerous wildlife, disruptions to the circadian rhythm, and hosts of other problems. If the natives can take over one day, they can live a prosperous life within the LIU.”
Doog: “Don’t you feel bad training them to be workers? Their life is probably better outside of the LIU’s economic empire.”
Galen: “The LIU will profit from this world regardless of the laborers’ species. The natives will get in the way one of these days, and the LIU will remove them from their lands and tuck them away in some reservation. It’s better to conform than to disappear.”
Doog: “I guess.”
Doog: “Don’t you feel bad training them to be workers? Their life is probably better outside of the LIU’s economic empire.”
Galen: “The LIU will profit from this world regardless of the laborers’ species. The natives will get in the way one of these days, and the LIU will remove them from their lands and tuck them away in some reservation. It’s better to conform than to disappear.”
Doog: “I guess.”
Doog: “What about the workers here now?”
Galen: “They won’t be losing their jobs anytime soon. It will take many years to educate the locals. Besides, most don’t want to be here, surrounded by dangerous creatures. They don’t have any alternatives at the moment.”
Doog: “What do you get out of all of this? You’ll lose your waterboy job, and you said science doesn’t pay.”
Galen: “The LIU will pay if I can train a local workforce. My payday will come when my water harvesting ends.”
Doog: “Well, good luck with that. Hope you keep the rest of your appendages.”
Galen: “Thanks.”
Galen: “They won’t be losing their jobs anytime soon. It will take many years to educate the locals. Besides, most don’t want to be here, surrounded by dangerous creatures. They don’t have any alternatives at the moment.”
Doog: “What do you get out of all of this? You’ll lose your waterboy job, and you said science doesn’t pay.”
Galen: “The LIU will pay if I can train a local workforce. My payday will come when my water harvesting ends.”
Doog: “Well, good luck with that. Hope you keep the rest of your appendages.”
Galen: “Thanks.”
Doog: “Well folks, that’s the story of the eyeball planet, Pila. There are valuable resources here, like fresh, clean meltwater, but it’s a dangerous environment. There’s endless sun, ferocious predators, and brutal, uncultured natives. People like Galen are harvesting these resources despite the danger, but they might not have to do it forever. The natives are being introduced to galactic language and trade. Soon, they might be able to harvest these resources themselves. I just hope no one gets mauled in the meantime. Oh well, see ya!”
Note: “Muckrats are not targeted by the Pylon Barrier System because they are no threat to the harvesters. The Muckrats seem to be learning the advantage staying near harvester sites where they are safe from Brutalines. This is aiding in their domestication.”
Note: “Muckrats are not targeted by the Pylon Barrier System because they are no threat to the harvesters. The Muckrats seem to be learning the advantage staying near harvester sites where they are safe from Brutalines. This is aiding in their domestication.”
