There are billions of stars, millions of planets, but there is only one man, Terrance McDoogal. Welcome to LIU Atlas.
LIU Atlas - Egelidus
The Ludgonian Industrial Union's galaxy contains billions of stars and billions of planets. Unfortunately, most residents of the LIU could only name a handful of these worlds. In order to improve astronomy grades across the LIU, TV2 has started a new program called LIU Atlas. Follow our host, Terrance McDoogal, as he takes you on a tour across the LIU and some of its more obscure worlds.
Note: This episode is presented in full screen. The corresponding dialogue is underneath each photo.
Note: This episode is presented in full screen. The corresponding dialogue is underneath each photo.
Doog: “Welcome to another episode of LIU Atlas. I’m your host, Terrance “Doog” McDoogal. Today, we’re visiting the planet, Egelidus. Egelidus orbits in the outermost ring of its star’s habitable zone – making it cold, but livable. This snowy planet, being only a few light years from the Marinjae Hyperspace Route, is a regional cargo hub. Goods come here to be distributed to other worlds in Egelidus’ proximity. Let’s head down and check it out.”
Doog: “Well folks, as you can see, my arrival did not go as expected. I’ve been detained.”
Sheriff: “The whole ‘talking to yourself’ business is not convincing me of your sanity.”
Doog: “I’m NOT talking to myself! I really am a TV reporter.”
Sheriff: “Speaking into some mechanical tube that vaguely resembles a microphone does not make you a reporter.”
Doog: “What about my Hover Cam?”
Sheriff: “Anyone can get a camera drone these days.”
Doog: “Sigh.”
Sheriff: “TV reporter or not, that doesn’t explain your wardrobe. Only stowaways, vagabonds, and psychopaths come to Egelidus dressed like that.”
Doog: “Wait…are you saying you locked me up because of clothes?”
Sheriff: “The lack thereof, actually. A sane person wouldn’t come to an ice planet with no coat, let alone no sleeves.”
Doog: “I didn’t think it would be all that cold. All that edge of the habitable zone nonsense. Besides, I heard there were jungles here. It can’t be too cold if there are jungles, right?”
Sheriff: “The more you talk, the more I’m convinced I’m doing the right thing. Now, let’s turn that drone off.”
One Hour Later:
Sheriff: “The whole ‘talking to yourself’ business is not convincing me of your sanity.”
Doog: “I’m NOT talking to myself! I really am a TV reporter.”
Sheriff: “Speaking into some mechanical tube that vaguely resembles a microphone does not make you a reporter.”
Doog: “What about my Hover Cam?”
Sheriff: “Anyone can get a camera drone these days.”
Doog: “Sigh.”
Sheriff: “TV reporter or not, that doesn’t explain your wardrobe. Only stowaways, vagabonds, and psychopaths come to Egelidus dressed like that.”
Doog: “Wait…are you saying you locked me up because of clothes?”
Sheriff: “The lack thereof, actually. A sane person wouldn’t come to an ice planet with no coat, let alone no sleeves.”
Doog: “I didn’t think it would be all that cold. All that edge of the habitable zone nonsense. Besides, I heard there were jungles here. It can’t be too cold if there are jungles, right?”
Sheriff: “The more you talk, the more I’m convinced I’m doing the right thing. Now, let’s turn that drone off.”
One Hour Later:
Patrik: “Thank you, sheriff. I’m glad we could come to an understanding.”
Sheriff: “I’m still not entirely convinced, but if you’re willing to vouch for him, I guess I can let him go.”
Doog: “You guess? It’s not like I killed someone! I didn’t wear sleeves!”
Sheriff: “Speaking of which, I hope you secured our inmate some more appropriate clothing, Patrik.”
Patrik: “I did.”
Sheriff: “I’m still not entirely convinced, but if you’re willing to vouch for him, I guess I can let him go.”
Doog: “You guess? It’s not like I killed someone! I didn’t wear sleeves!”
Sheriff: “Speaking of which, I hope you secured our inmate some more appropriate clothing, Patrik.”
Patrik: “I did.”
Doog: “I mean, it is a little cold.”
Patrik: “It’s below freezing. You wouldn’t have lasted long.”
Doog: “Was jail really necessary, though?”
Patrik: “Being a cargo hub, we see a lot of stowaways. If port security didn’t intervene, the place would be littered with frozen corpses. Even worse, some of these stowaways choose crime to stay warm.”
Doog: “Crime keeps them warm? How is that possible?”
Patrik: “They kill you for your coat.”
Doog: “Oh.”
Patrik: “It’s below freezing. You wouldn’t have lasted long.”
Doog: “Was jail really necessary, though?”
Patrik: “Being a cargo hub, we see a lot of stowaways. If port security didn’t intervene, the place would be littered with frozen corpses. Even worse, some of these stowaways choose crime to stay warm.”
Doog: “Crime keeps them warm? How is that possible?”
Patrik: “They kill you for your coat.”
Doog: “Oh.”
Doog: “You’re Patrik, right?”
Patrik: “Yes. Sorry, I never officially introduced myself.”
Doog: “It was kind of hard with all the jailing and lawyering we went through. So, what do you do on Egelidus?”
Patrik: “I’m a scientist.”
Doog: “I see. How exactly does that fit into the cargo industry?”
Patrik: “It doesn’t. Unlike the other residents here, I’m not tied to the cargo port. I only come here a few times a month to resupply.”
Doog: “I didn’t know Egelidus was anything more than a cargo hub.”
Patrik: “I mean, like 99.9% of Egelidus revolves around trade – from the docks to the distributors to the small businesses that support it. In fact, I might be the only resident on the whole planet that even leaves the city.”
Doog: “We’re leaving the city?”
Patrik: “Yep, ignore the warnings. We’re heading out.”
Patrik: “Yes. Sorry, I never officially introduced myself.”
Doog: “It was kind of hard with all the jailing and lawyering we went through. So, what do you do on Egelidus?”
Patrik: “I’m a scientist.”
Doog: “I see. How exactly does that fit into the cargo industry?”
Patrik: “It doesn’t. Unlike the other residents here, I’m not tied to the cargo port. I only come here a few times a month to resupply.”
Doog: “I didn’t know Egelidus was anything more than a cargo hub.”
Patrik: “I mean, like 99.9% of Egelidus revolves around trade – from the docks to the distributors to the small businesses that support it. In fact, I might be the only resident on the whole planet that even leaves the city.”
Doog: “We’re leaving the city?”
Patrik: “Yep, ignore the warnings. We’re heading out.”
Doog: “I’m really loving this coat now.”
Patrik: “The wind makes it colder.”
Doog: “So, where exactly are we headed? Everything looks the same.”
Patrik: “The jungles.”
Doog: “What! The jungles are real? When I told the sheriff that, he thought I was even crazier!”
Patrik: “The sheriff and the other workers never leave the city. To them, the jungles are just a myth.”
Patrik: “The wind makes it colder.”
Doog: “So, where exactly are we headed? Everything looks the same.”
Patrik: “The jungles.”
Doog: “What! The jungles are real? When I told the sheriff that, he thought I was even crazier!”
Patrik: “The sheriff and the other workers never leave the city. To them, the jungles are just a myth.”
Patrik: “But a myth, they are not.”
Doog: “That’s one weird looking jungle. For one, it’s not green.”
Patrik: “The plants of Egelidus are high in anthocyanins, making their flowers and foliage shades of red and purple.”
Doog: “Is that what stops them from freezing?”
Patrik: “No, anthocyanin is just a pigment. Their cold-resistant biology is much more complex. It’s done with thermogenic enzymes, like alternative oxidase and ubiquinol.”
Doog: “That’s one weird looking jungle. For one, it’s not green.”
Patrik: “The plants of Egelidus are high in anthocyanins, making their flowers and foliage shades of red and purple.”
Doog: “Is that what stops them from freezing?”
Patrik: “No, anthocyanin is just a pigment. Their cold-resistant biology is much more complex. It’s done with thermogenic enzymes, like alternative oxidase and ubiquinol.”
Doog: “Those names mean nothing to me. Explain it me like I’m a traumatic brain injury survivor.”
Patrik: “The plants create heat in the mitochondria without using proton gradients…”
Doog: “A more severe injury than that.”
Patrik: “The plants of Egelidus don’t worry about the cold because they make heat. Heat keeps them from freezing. Heat keeps their leaves clear of snow, allowing photosynthesis. Heat even allows their roots and seeds to penetrate the hard ground.”
Doog: “Interesting.”
Patrik: “The plants create heat in the mitochondria without using proton gradients…”
Doog: “A more severe injury than that.”
Patrik: “The plants of Egelidus don’t worry about the cold because they make heat. Heat keeps them from freezing. Heat keeps their leaves clear of snow, allowing photosynthesis. Heat even allows their roots and seeds to penetrate the hard ground.”
Doog: “Interesting.”
Patrik: “They actually radiate enough heat to raise the temperature within their vicinity.”
Doog: “So, I could have gone sleeveless!”
Patrik: “Not that much heat.”
Doog: “Darn.”
Patrik: “If you were stranded or underequipped, though, this would be the place to hunker down. Those few degrees would buy you some extra time.”
Doog: “So, I could have gone sleeveless!”
Patrik: “Not that much heat.”
Doog: “Darn.”
Patrik: “If you were stranded or underequipped, though, this would be the place to hunker down. Those few degrees would buy you some extra time.”
Doog: “Whoa! Is that an animal?”
Patrik: “It is.”
Patrik: “It is.”
Patrik: “I’ve been calling them Salf, but it hasn’t been approved by the LIU Bureau of Naming.”
Doog: “Salf?”
Patrik: “Yes – a humorous acronym I developed – Six-Armed-Lazy-Fellows.”
Doog: “We apparently have different senses of humor. So, can you tell me anything about the Salf, besides their six arms and unfunny name?”
Doog: “Salf?”
Patrik: “Yes – a humorous acronym I developed – Six-Armed-Lazy-Fellows.”
Doog: “We apparently have different senses of humor. So, can you tell me anything about the Salf, besides their six arms and unfunny name?”
Patrik: “Salf are herbivores. They can eat any of the species of plants on Egelidus, and they eat them a lot. Staying warm must take a lot of metabolic energy. Salf never stray far from the jungles, probably because they constantly need to eat. But it is possible they need the plants' warmth as well. They have no natural predators, so they show no signs of fear when approached.”
Doog: “What’s the lazy part of Salf?”
Patrik: “They hardly move when they’re not eating.”
Doog: “Ah, makes sense. Are Salf or any of these plants valuable to the LIU?”
Doog: “What’s the lazy part of Salf?”
Patrik: “They hardly move when they’re not eating.”
Doog: “Ah, makes sense. Are Salf or any of these plants valuable to the LIU?”
Patrik: “That’s what I study here.”
Doog: “You live out here?”
Patrik: “Yes, in a jungle clearing.”
Doog: “Must be pretty lonely.”
Patrik: “I have the wildlife to keep me company. Let’s head inside.”
Doog: “You live out here?”
Patrik: “Yes, in a jungle clearing.”
Doog: “Must be pretty lonely.”
Patrik: “I have the wildlife to keep me company. Let’s head inside.”
Doog: “I honestly thought it would be bigger – that’s what she said.”
Patrik: “Huh?”
Doog: “I thought your house/lab would be bigger. There’s not a lot of room for science.”
Patrik: “There’s plenty of space for the preliminary work I’m doing. I’m mostly collecting and analyzing genetic and chemical samples. I have started experimenting with growing local plant species, if you check out the top of my cabinets.”
Doog: “Find anything valuable yet?”
Patrik: “I’ve only been here for two years. I haven’t had enough time to make any major breakthroughs. Most of my time has been spent understanding the thermogenic properties of the plant life. Once I figure it out, it might be useful for terraforming or growing food in colder environments.”
Doog: “That’s a no, I guess. Nothing valuable yet.”
Patrik: “I wouldn’t say…”
Patrik: “Huh?”
Doog: “I thought your house/lab would be bigger. There’s not a lot of room for science.”
Patrik: “There’s plenty of space for the preliminary work I’m doing. I’m mostly collecting and analyzing genetic and chemical samples. I have started experimenting with growing local plant species, if you check out the top of my cabinets.”
Doog: “Find anything valuable yet?”
Patrik: “I’ve only been here for two years. I haven’t had enough time to make any major breakthroughs. Most of my time has been spent understanding the thermogenic properties of the plant life. Once I figure it out, it might be useful for terraforming or growing food in colder environments.”
Doog: “That’s a no, I guess. Nothing valuable yet.”
Patrik: “I wouldn’t say…”
Doog: “Well folks, that’s Egelidus. This – colder than I thought – planet is a local cargo port, but it potentially has more to offer. There are plants here that make heat, allowing them to grow in these frigid conditions. There’s even some animal life here, although it is poorly named. Oh well, see ya!”
Note:
To: The LIU Bureau of Naming
From: Terrance McDoogal
Reference: Salf? Seriously?
We have to do something about the name of that creature on Egelidus. What the heck is a Salf? Sure, it’s an acronym, but lazy-fellow? Really? Surely, we can name it something better. Here’s a few suggestions: Sadoog (Six -Armed / lazy guy named Doog), Doog (just a cool name), Fatso (eats a lot), or Doog Handsomethera (I’m handsome). I’ll keep thinking of more. Let me know if you like any so far!
Thanks,
Terrance “Doog” McDoogal
Note:
To: The LIU Bureau of Naming
From: Terrance McDoogal
Reference: Salf? Seriously?
We have to do something about the name of that creature on Egelidus. What the heck is a Salf? Sure, it’s an acronym, but lazy-fellow? Really? Surely, we can name it something better. Here’s a few suggestions: Sadoog (Six -Armed / lazy guy named Doog), Doog (just a cool name), Fatso (eats a lot), or Doog Handsomethera (I’m handsome). I’ll keep thinking of more. Let me know if you like any so far!
Thanks,
Terrance “Doog” McDoogal
